charisshalom

2006-12-28T13:55:00.001-06:00

Moving day is here... Bryan and Tara's new blog is now online!

Check it out at http://charisshalom.fjministries.com.

2006-12-27T14:10:00.000-06:00

Apologies in advance for any inconveniences you may experience reading this blog over the next day or so. I'm in the process of migrating this blog to wordpress for Bryan and Tara.

The new URL will be available soon.

Blessings,
John Stickley
http://www.toward-the-goal.net

2006-12-25T16:33:00.000-06:00

Merry Christmas!!!

I am at my parents in Prairie Grove, Arkansas where I can actually get a computer to work to allow me to blog. Our super internet blocker has been blocking blogger ever since they made the new changes. The picture above is from a Christmas past, probably 4 or 5 years ago, at the Riley household. Dad always loves Christmas and is extravagant in giving. In fact, although he has never been a church goer he has taught me more about being generous than anyone else I know.

My son, Tanner, now 8, enjoyed the fruits of the Christmas shown above and below.

What thrills my heart is that Tanner has that generous heart passed on from my dad. This year Tanner took on the role of teaching us all what giving is about. We arrived back from the University of the Nations to quite a bit of work. We often found ourselves still up at midnight working on the house, unpacking, Christmas, etc. As a result we ended up with only one afternoon to shop for everyone for Christmas and we simply didn't have time to take any of the kids to let them shop for their brother and sister. Tanner, without either Tara or I knowing, made or found presents for everyone in the family, wrapped them himself secretly, and hid them under the tree. So, this morning when we were all passing out the presents we were all surprised by incredible gifts from our little giver.

I hope to be able to blog from home soon. I have often thought of a "postable" note, but have been unable to share them (perhaps it's been a blessing in disguise to you). I just wanted to write this while i had five minutes (even though my family keeps asking where I am and wanting me to join them). If things don't work out with blogger, please be on the lookout for a post that says I've switched to some new site.

2006-12-14T15:15:00.000-06:00

This season of serving at the University of the Nations is coming to a close. We board our plane from Kona to Fayetteville, Arkansas tonight at 11:59 p.m. Hawaiian time (3:59 a.m. CST). We have been so blessed not just by great sunsets while here, but also by incredible relationships with people like Chong Ho and Kris Won, Nick and Jen Greener, Ben and Angie Wicks, Holger and Jillie Schein, Loren Cunningham, John and Sonja Randerson, Paul and Lynette Randerson, Josh Harmsworth, Tyler Johnson, Andy Huddleston and so many others. Our children have been discipled through our time together and by excellent schools, dedicated to teaching them to follow Jesus. We have worked on a number of projects and hope that our time here hasn't just been a blessing to us, but that we have blessed the University of the Nations. Most of all, God has renewed our faith and restored in us the joy of our salvation. We pray it becomes more and more manifest in our daily lives.

We know not yet where we will be come Spring of 2007, but we are praying about that earnestly and fervently. We have always wondered if God would release us to do our training in our home state, and that is still possible, but there are other opportunities of which we are becoming aware.

YWAM has an incredible mission and ministry. In our time here we have seen people truly seeking God's direction for their lives. The teaching is sound and the desire to see people hear and know the gospel of Jesus Christ is strong. Pray for YWAM. Pray for the gospel to be carried throughout the world. And please pray that we will not forget the lessons God has taught us here as we prepare to carry out our ministry.

2006-12-14T10:46:00.000-06:00

"Whatever happens, conduct yourselves in a manner worthy of the gospel of Christ. Then, whether I come and see you or only hear about you in my absence, I will know that you stand firm in one spirit, contending as one man for the faith of the gospel without being frightened in any way by those who oppose you. This is a sign to them that they will be destroyed, but that you will be saved—and that by God. "

Colossians 1:27-28

I'm not sure how many times I've read over these verses in Colossians and focused only on the very first part: conducting myself in a manner worthy of the gospel of Christ. That alone is an interesting discussion and I'd love to hear what people believe is such conduct. However, God really bolded the part above that I have bolded as I read these words: standing firm in one spirit and contending as one man for the faith of the gospel.

Wow! Does that describe today's church? It should convict us through and through. And, whereas we all can be convicted by the fact that people will know we are Christians by our love and that people will know that the Father sent Jesus by our unity, I'm not sure we often think about the fact that our unity also is a sign to those who don't believe of their impending destruction lest they receive by faith the gospel as well.

2006-12-12T01:44:00.000-06:00

Here are a couple of oft quoted and beloved scripture passages:

"Be joyful always; pray continually; give thanks in all circumstances, for this is God's will for you in Christ Jesus. Do not put out the Spirit's fire; do not treat prophecies with contempt. Test everything. Hold on to the good. Avoid every kind of evil. May God himself, the God of peace, sanctify you through and through. May your whole spirit, soul and body be kept blameless at the coming of our Lord Jesus Christ. The one who calls you is faithful and he will do it."

1 Thessalonians 5:16-24;

"Therefore, I urge you, brothers, in view of God's mercy, to offer your bodies as living sacrifices, holy and pleasing to God—this is your spiritual act of worship. Do not conform any longer to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God's will is—his good, pleasing and perfect will."

Romans 12:1-2

Both of these passages instruct us in the life of Jesus. It isn't so much that things things are magical or are requirements of salvation; instead, they are what Jesus did and now that we have His mind and have declared ourselves to be followers of Jesus these are things that should naturally follow through the work of the Holy Spirit in our lives. Out of the love He has placed in our hearts for Him rejoicing, praying, and being thankful in all things should be the natural way of our life. Out of our love for Him we should desire to worship Him always, and that worship involves offering ourselves every moment as living sacrifices, set apart and pleasing to Him. We shouldn't conform to the world; in fact, as Christ's followers we cannot! If we are conforming to the world then we aren't really living as we proclaim to be.

Now, here are some questions that God has asked me about these verse as His Spirit has worked His comfort and conviction in my heart: Do I really seek Him daily? For example, when I was practicing law was I offering myself daily as a living sacrifice asking Him if He wanted me to continue practicing law or if He had a new course set for me? When was the last time you asked God whether you should continue to preach at your church, work at your job, be a member of whatever club, etc.? Have you even considered that He may have a different course for you and desire that you offer that up on the altar of your life?

Should we not pray daily that God will show us where He is leading us? I'm not trying to paralyze us with indecision or a lack of commitment; however, what are we really committed to? Following God or following the path we are currently on? And, how difficult is it to ask Him daily to fill us with His Spirit, to confirm the path that we are on, to enable our lifesong to be completely dedicated to Him?

With those thoughts, I ask you, my friends and fellow workers in the faith, to pray for the Rileys as we consider where God is leading us next. Where are we to GO in 2007? We feel compelled to do some further training in preparation for more missions work, but we don't know where and when that should begin. Thank you for your prayers, your faith, and your encouragement. And, if you have any ideas, words or visions from the Lord, don't hesitate to share them with me at bwriley4[at]yahoo[dot]com or by commenting here.

Furthermore, if you feel that the Rileys might have something worthwhile to share at your church to a Sunday School class or otherwise, let us know. We'd love to meet you if we haven't and definitely are burning to tell the story of what He has been doing in our lives. We are willing servants.

2006-12-10T19:31:00.000-06:00

I am a week late in posting this, but last weekend, on December 2nd and 3rd, we celebrated Tanner Gracen Riley's 8th Birthday. He was born December 3, 1998, after almost 20 hours of loving labor, our first child. We packed up our family, as did the Schein's, and spent the weekend at the Volcano National Park on the Big Island . We had volcano cake and as you can see breathed volcanic fumes (a lot of stinky sulfur). You can see behind us boys the fumes arising from the mouth of Kilauea, the one volcano on the island that is currently active and spilling forth lava from an open vent. The crater itself is simply releasing gases and hasn't had lava in it for a few years, but there is lava flowing from the same system via a vent in the mountain down to the ocean. We actually went and viewed the lava flowing into the sea after dark. We weren't able to hike, with our littlest ones, as close as you can go, but we looked through a telescope like device from a couple of miles away and saw the actual orange flow disappearing into a roiling sea, complete with lots of steam!

We are very proud of our son, Tanner. Wherever we go on campus we hear big and little voices saying "Hi, Tanner!" It would seem that there isn't a soul on campus that doesn't know his name. He seems to be able to talk to anyone and it seems that almost anyone enjoys talking with him. Please pray for our son, Tanner, that God will continue to grow Him in strength and wisdom and in favor with God and man.

The Scheins are an amazing YWAM family who have been serving as missionaries for some time. Hoger, from Hamburg, Germany, and Jillie, from New Zealand, met in the mission field and have had all three of their boys along the way, serving in places like South Africa, England, and Germany. Pray that God will continue to multiply their ministry as they return to New Zealand for the holidays and then to South Africa.

2006-12-10T16:35:00.000-06:00

Lord, thank you for Your Word. May you speak to our hearts always, bringing about repentance and lives surrendered to you.

Our sermon this morning included references to 1 Corinthians 2, and as we pondered those words I noticed these in the next chapter, and I couldn't help but think they are so applicable to the Church today.

1 And I, brethren, could not speak to you as to spiritual people but as to carnal, as to babes in Christ. 2 I fed you with milk and not with solid food; for until now you were not able to receive it, and even now you are still not able; 3 for you are still carnal. For where there are envy, strife, and divisions among you, are you not carnal and behaving like mere men?

What do you think? Are the divisions and the strife in the SBC and between denominations simply evidences of our carnality? Why do we have denominations anyway? Are they helpful to the Body of Christ? To the gospel of Jesus Christ?

2006-12-09T23:34:00.000-06:00

Here's a blog always worth a serious read (and where you can grow in wisdom): http://vtmbottomline.blogspot.com and here's a couple of well done posts on another blog (check out the December 5th and 9th entries): http://nathanfinn.blogspot.com.

2006-12-09T11:27:00.000-06:00

"Well, Doctor, I just can't take it anymore. I keep trying and trying to tell that one voice in my head to shut up because it keeps making fun of me like I am a child. It keeps calling me names and telling me I am throwing 'temper tantrums.' Life just isn't about playing by his rules."

"No, Doctor, you don't understand, I have this nice, neat, and orderly world. Everything makes perfect sense and everything will be just fine as long as everyone plays by these rules. The rules are critical and he just doesn't undestand. If any of the rules aren't followed then anarchy will result. I mean, if you don't believe everything just like the rules say, then the next thing you know everyone will be wondering whether or not Jesus really was the Son of God."

"You see, Doctor? He thinks that life is solved so long as everyone follows his set of rules and beliefs. Pharisee!"

"See there, Doctor? He wants to water down the beliefs. He's a liberal! I think we should kick him out of here."

In unison, "Sometimes I just wish I could silence that other voice!!!"

The Doctor: "If any of you lacks wisdom, he should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to him. But when he asks, he must believe and not doubt, because he who doubts is like a wave of the sea, blown and tossed by the wind. That man should not think he will receive anything from the Lord; he is a double-minded man, unstable in all he does."

The Doctor: "The body is a unit, though it is made up of many parts; and though all its parts are many, they form one body. So it is with Christ. For we were all baptized by one Spirit into one body—whether Jews or Greeks, slave or free—and we were all given the one Spirit to drink.
Now the body is not made up of one part but of many. If the foot should say, "Because I am not a hand, I do not belong to the body," it would not for that reason cease to be part of the body. And if the ear should say, "Because I am not an eye, I do not belong to the body," it would not for that reason cease to be part of the body. If the whole body were an eye, where would the sense of hearing be? If the whole body were an ear, where would the sense of smell be? But in fact God has arranged the parts in the body, every one of them, just as he wanted them to be. If they were all one part, where would the body be? As it is, there are many parts, but one body.
The eye cannot say to the hand, "I don't need you!" And the head cannot say to the feet, "I don't need you!" On the contrary, those parts of the body that seem to be weaker are indispensable, and the parts that we think are less honorable we treat with special honor. And the parts that are unpresentable are treated with special modesty, while our presentable parts need no special treatment. But God has combined the members of the body and has given greater honor to the parts that lacked it, so that there should be no division in the body, but that its parts should have equal concern for each other. If one part suffers, every part suffers with it; if one part is honored, every part rejoices with it.
Now you are the body of Christ, and each one of you is a part of it. And in the church God has appointed first of all apostles, second prophets, third teachers, then workers of miracles, also those having gifts of healing, those able to help others, those with gifts of administration, and those speaking in different kinds of tongues. Are all apostles? Are all prophets? Are all teachers? Do all work miracles? Do all have gifts of healing? Do all speak in tongues? Do all interpret? But eagerly desire the greater gifts. And now I will show you the most excellent way.... LOVE!"

2006-12-06T23:28:00.000-06:00

Oh Father, give us more who would stand and show us what it means to truly live like Jesus, walking every step by faith in your promises and commands. We need modern day examples of the Christ life desperately.

2006-12-05T01:54:00.000-06:00

God called me to Him when I was 9. I felt alone. I was hurting. From my childlike perspective, I had lost more than I could bear. My family had moved twice in a little over a year, each time to help care for one of my parents' dads. My mom's dad, Grandpa Sharp, became my best friend, and then died of prostate cancer and then we moved 1000 miles away to a tiny duplex with nothing because of financial problems. My mom went to work for the first time. My dad worked all the time. At the age of 8 I was in a new place and was given a key to our home because when I was finished with school no one else would be home. It frankly shaped much of the rest of my life, but, praise be to God, it also was part of what helped me see that I needed Him desperately.

For whatever reason, the churches I ended up at were Southern Baptist. My parents didn't take me or make me go to church, but once God called me to Him, I desired to go. So, to this day, I have been a member of a Southern Baptist Church. I'm glad for the denomination. It teaches sound doctrine and tries to teach people how to study God's word. But I really have no particular affinity for it.

I really am just a Christian, better yet a Jesus follower. Am I showing disrespect to the SBC because I say this? No, not at all. I just don't think any creation of man exceeds the creation of God. God didn't create the SBC; God created the church. And, God has a purpose for the church and our hearts should be united with Him in seeing the church's purpose fulfilled. I desire greatly for healing and power in the SBC, and most imporantly, in all the Body of Christ.

God built his church on the rock of Christ and the church is called to submit to Christ. Christ calls us to surrender completely. We must die to ourselves, take up our cross, and follow Him with all our hearts, soul and strength.

I am praying for the SBC. I am praying for the gathering of SBC pastors in Dallas tomorrow, December 5, 2006. I wish I could attend, but I am still here serving at the University of the Nations. I pray you will pray for them, too, whether you are a member of, or ever have been a member of, an SBC church or not. You see, we are called to pray for one another. And, we are urged, in view of God's mercy, to offer ourselves as living sacrifices, holy and pleasing to God. It is our spiritual act of worship. (So, even if we have been wounded by someone who was southern baptist, or have particular concerns about some SBCers attitudes, we must pray for them and lay down those selfish concerns because it is not consistent with God's love or plan that we should hold any grudge against anyone in the Body of Christ.) We must not conform any longer to the patter nof this world, but must be transformed by the renewing of our minds so that we will be able to test and approve what God's will is, His good, pleasing and perfect will. Moreover, we are not to think more highly of ourselves that we ought, but rather we must think of ourselves with sober judgment, in accordance wi th the measure of faith God has given us. AND HERE'S THE KICKER: Just as each of us has one body with many members, and these members do not all have the same function, so in Christ we who are many form one body, and each member belongs to all the others. Romans 12:1-5.

Did you catch that? We belong to one another. We are commanded to submit to one another in love. We are to be like Jesus. Why aren't we????? What spirit is winning the war against the Body of Christ to keep its members warring against one another rather than taking the battle against Satan and the powers of this world to see the message of Jesus and His love proclaimed from every rooftop?

I believe that most of those gathering in Dallas tomorrow are fully desirous of unity among their Christian brothers and sisters. How good and pleasant it is when brothers dwell together in unity! Psalm 133:1. And they also desire that the gospel of Jesus be proclaimed to all the earth. So, here is my prayer for them, for all who send them, and for all in the Body of Christ:

Lord, forgive me of my infatuation with myself. Rather than submitting to others in love, I all too often seek my own way. Rather than living the life of love, I boast, I am unkind, I am hopeless, I am angry, I am self-seeking, I am unloving. Lord, fill me with Your spirit. Give me a faith immeasurable. Let every word I speak be straight from your Spirit and consistent with your heart and perfect will.

I pray that the SBC pastors meeting tomorrow will be there living a life worthy of the calling they have received; that they will be completely humble and gentle, patient, bearing with one another in love. I pray they will make every effort to kep the unity of the Spirit through the bond of peace. I pray that they will be filled with the Spirit and that there spiritual gifts will guide them, to prepare them for works of service, so that the body of Christ may be built up and that they may be leaders who will help the body reach unity in the faith and in the knowledge of the Son of God, becoming mature and attaining to the whole measure of the fullness of Christ.

I pray they will be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving one another, and all who cannot attend, just as in Christ God forgave each of us. May they be imitators of You, living a life of love, just as Christ loved us and gave Himself up for us as a fragrant offering and sacrifice to God. If there are any who are struggling with immorality, impurity, greed, obscenity, foolish talk, or coarse joking, I pray that you will either prevent that one from attending or, even more graciously, enable them to repent of it publicly while gathered with those there, that they may lovingly pray for that one and help restore them to a true walk of faith, filled with the Spirit and overflowing with His gifts. Let nothing be present that will quench Your Holy Spirit from filling each of them and the place in which they gather. Shake them to their cores with Your purpose, call, and love.

Oh God, please fulfill Christ's holy prayer that we would be unified together in You. Let the world have no choice but to see Your love in us, Your power in us, Your truth in us. Let gatherings like the one that is taking place tomorrow be just the start, the spark, of repentance and revival that will flood throughout America and the world, by your Holy Spirit, so that many will come to know You in Christ. Give us a heart to reach people all over the world with the message of Christ. Give us lives that make it impossible not to share with others the joy and power found in Christ. Thank you for your love. Thank you for your grace. Thank you for saving us. May we hold back nothing from You. May we, and they, be changed through your amazing grace. In the name of Jesus, the One who Saves, I pray, AMEN!

2006-11-29T23:43:00.000-06:00

Sometimes I am amazed at the rancor that takes place among Christian men and women about the "right" reading of scripture, doctrine, the "right" way to govern a church, etc. and so forth ad nauseum. And, I am not talking about having such discussions over things like whether Christ is divine, whether salvations is secure, whether salvation is by grace alone or requires some works, or whether Christ is the only way to the Father. I am talking about great angst and argument over things like whether there are such things as "private prayer languages," whether women can serve in certain roles in ministry, whether worship is too charismatic or not, whether anyone can conduct baptism or whether certain people can participate in the Lord's supper.

I appreciated Dorcas Hawker's recent post on choosing optimism in the midst of this atmosphere. And, it doesn't even require people of different religions or denominations within faiths to develop such rancor. In fact, often the most heated discussions take place within single denominations. And, while in the midst of all the stormy dialogue accusations arise, attacks are made, battle lines are drawn, and all of it is done in the name of defending the faith.

I don't want to stop just at choosing optimism, however, I want to choose faith in the One True Living God! Let me explain.

I frankly don't understand the rancor among Christians. To be Christians means to be like Christ. And, being like Christ and showing that we love Jesus means to obey Jesus. Jesus is the Word and obeying Him means obeying His word. Moreover, it would seem that walking by faith clearly would be to obey the Word regardless of whether it makes sense or not.

So, what does the Word teach us about our conduct and attitudes toward brothers and sisters in Christ? First, we know that Jesus' last recorded lengthy prayer included a prayer for us that we would be one and brought to complete unity to let the world know that the Father sent the Son and have loved them even as the Father loved the Son. John 17:20-23. (But unity isn't a primary doctrine, and what is unity really??? It can't mean that we don't argue over things, does it??) We know that blessed are the peacemakers, who will be called the children of God. Matthew 5:9. We are commanded not to judge. Matthew 7:1. We are taught that God is in control and that we shouldn't worry about anything as though we might some how change something with all our worry; instead, we should seek first His Kingdom and His righteousness. Matthew 6:25-34.

We are taught to owe no man anything except love and to love them as we love ourselves. Romans 13:8-10. We are told to bless those who persecute us, to bles and not curse; to live in harmony with one another; not to be proud; not to repay anyone evil for evil and to be careful to do what is right in the eyes of everybody. We are even told to do all that is possible within our own power to live at peace with everyone! (But God, didn't you hear what he said about me? I mean, how can I just walk away from those comments?) We are told not to take revenge and leave room for God's wrath and to overcome evil with good. Romans 12:9-21.

More? How about accepting him whose faith is weak, without passing judgment on disputable matters. Romans 14:1. (But God, how can I do that, I have to disciple him, don't I??? What if he spreads that opinion??? Surely I can be the guardian of "the truth" (as I see it).)

People ask, "What is wrong with the church today?" "Why is it not having the impact on culture that it should, given the power of Jesus?" Or, even in our own lives we ask, "Why do I seem to be so powerless to battle this sin within me?" "Why does it seem I fail in my Christian walk?"

Could it be as simple as the fact that we aren't living by the words of the One true Living God? I think of God's words to the Israelites in Deuteronomy 6, when he tells them to keep His words upon their hearts, to impress them on their children, to talk about them when they sit at home and when they walk along the road, when they lie down and when they get up. (How often do we do that??) He tells them that if they do these things that all will go well. God tells us plainly that people will know that we are Christians by our love. The church loses its saltiness to the world when it doesn't live by faith upon the loving words of the Word, Jesus, and people have no reason to follow us because we don't appear to be following Christ.

I believe the only way we will truly reach this dark world for Christ is to repent of our lack of faith and of the many idols we worship. Just as it talked about in 2 Chronicles 7:14, God's people must humble themselves and pray and seek His face and turn/repent from their wicked ways. If there are any who believe they don't have wicked ways or that they are following all the commands, then please continue to do so; otherwise, we need to join together in humility and beg the forgiveness of our gracious and loving God for our pettiness, doubt, and lack of love.

I know there will be many Southern Baptist leaders gathering soon to discuss matters significant to that denomination. I pray they will choose complete surrender to the Spirit's leading and the Father's call upon their lives, wholly choosing to follow the principles God has spelled out for all of us. I pray that I, and all of my fellow brothers and sisters in Christ, will do so as well.

2006-11-29T15:41:00.000-06:00

My last post was about God working me over as I struggled with sleep. Well, that was just the beginning. I have spent the last four days with fevers as high as 103, which, for an adult, or at least for this adult, means loss of all strength and will to live. Even with medication my fever would only get down to about 100. It finally broke today. I'm exhausted, achy, and generally having a hard time recuperating. I am so tired of trying to find an elusive comfortable position in bed, but that was about the best goal I could have during these last few days.

I don't really have anything profound to say about it, nor did I have some vision while full of fever. For the most part I spent four days on my back, occasionally reading books. I will say that I realized that the only thing I really could do while in such a weakened state besides read was pray. And, with that thought I realized that that is the attitude God always calls us to. All too often I "believe" I can handle something so I just do it without praying and without depending upon God for direction and strength. So, one thing I prayed during that time of utmost weakness was that God would help me to remember that no matter how "strong" I seem I always need to pray and depend upon him.

I hope to publish some pictures of my kids and from around the island soon. My computer has had some issues of late, too, so I hope that I will be able to do so.

2006-11-25T09:02:00.000-06:00

You just never know when God's going to speak to you or what little thing He may use to help you hear His voice. Last night I was reading a book my wife had just finished and she wanted me to read it. It wasn't a book I would have ever picked up and read through without her encouragement as it is somewhat of a "Christian chick" novel with a female author and female main character.

In the story, the main character is experiencing terrible upheaval in her life as her husband becomes consumed by work (in part because she wasn't listening to his needs) and at the same time she is reading a journal of an ancestor of hers that she found in her mother's attic. In what I was reading last night the second storyline was set on a rural corn farm, and the young journal writer was about 14 years old. Her heart had just been trampled upon by a young man who had become her first crush, and she wrote that "my mama said that idols always have feet of clay."

Well, God was working me over last night. That is why it is only 5 a.m. here and I am finally at the computer writing this. I haven't slept much at all. Many would say it was just physical because one of the "idols" God reminded me of last night was my belly. Like the Cretans. Here we have for the most part been able to let go of good ol' fashioned food worship in some ways, simply because we cannot afford to eat out much and the food that is served is more often sufficient as opposed to decadent or succulent. But, at the same time, what that can facilitate is a certain desire driven "need" to go get some "real food."

Now, you will laugh at this paragraph because of the place where I ended up with my family getting such food. Whereas I used to be somewhat of a regular diner at places like the Palm steakhouse, great italian eateries, a number of great restaurants in Philly, DC, and other metropolitan areas, last night my whole family was literally abuzz with energy because we ended up in a Denny's. The kids were literally bouncing on the booths and excitedly reading their menus to find all the perfect pancakes, eggs, bacon, sausage, etc. I ordered a fabulous scrambler that had ham and jalapeno in it, but of course it comes with a huge helping of hash browns, and three gigantic pancakes. Heavy sigh.

Meanwhile, yesterday, we all went over to some friends' house here in Kona to watch our college alma mater play football. Yes, we are Arkansas Razorbacks fans. Woooooo Pig Soooie.... only, well, we lost. And, of course, while God was working me over about my food he also was reminding me of how much that game affected my mood...how my kids would never sit for 3-4 hours to watch a football game and, as they ran around and made noise, how quickly I was snapping at them to quiet down (all so I could watch a silly football game), which only got worse as our quarterback made one bad pass after another.

I literally felt like I was going to throw up last night. My belly was very upset with me for over filling it with greasy spoon (but very yummy) food, and God's still small voice was reminding me how quickly I could delight more in something sensual rather than spiritual. And, as He also tied that into my attitude around the football game, I heard that little 14 year old girl recording what her mother said, which was developed from God's word, that "idols always have feet of clay." Another heavy sigh..

For me, when I struggle through these types of conversations with God and my heart, I keep wanting to say, but, Lord, surely it is okay to watch football or enjoy a good meal. I mean, how weird do I have to become? Do I just end up holed up some where and only read the bible and pray all the time or what? Praise God He is so patient with us. He's heard that cry so many times from me. He reminds me that I am free in Christ, but that He alone is worthy of worship. If I let things of this world get between my worship and Him, I have erected yet another idol in my heart and am headed down that path of doublemindedness. Whether it is the god of sex, the god of food, the god of pride, the god of work, the god of family, the god of recreation, the god of laziness, all gods will fail me, be unfaithful, and have feet of clay. He alone is worthy of worship and He alone will do all things in accordance with His nature and character, which is defined by love. The heaviest sigh yet.

Lord, please help me keep my eyes on You so that I won't sink into the waves. Please help me seek first Your kingdom and allow you to be my delight. Tear down the high places in my heart and mind and give me the grace to offer myself as a living sacrifice to You every moment of my life.

"And whatever you do, whether in word or in deed, do it all in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God the Father through Him." Colossians 3:17

2006-11-22T13:00:00.000-06:00

I know this may be true in many places in the more southern parts of the United States, but being here in the southernmost place of the United States, in the middle of the Pacific, focusing on missions (which means thinking more globally than I ever have before), holidays have a way of sneaking up on you. It is strange not to have seen any leaves changing colors or falling to the ground, to keep having 85 degree days, and to be in a place far away from family and realize that Thanksgiving and Christmas are knocking on the door. We have not heard one single Christmas song, seen one Christmas display, seen one Christmas season TV commercial, or felt Jack Frost nipping at our noses.

I don't think there necessarily is a connection here, but, what is amazing is that, in spite of all of that, our family this year is more thankful and prepared for Thanksgiving than we have ever been before. We are thankful that our family is together, much more now than ever before. We are thankful that we are seeking Him daily in His word, learning more about it, and hearing His voice more clearly than we used to hear it. We are thankful that His grace covers all our sins and that we can serve Him in spite of our battles with the flesh. We are thankful for tears, laughter, heart to heart communication, learning how to accept our hearts, seeing our children learn bible verses with joy, watching our kids learn new responsibilities and play well together, really beginning to believe that God truly loves us.

Thank you for all of your prayers and encouragement. And, with that, I pray:

Father, please bless each reader of these simple words. May each individual truly begin to understand what it means to be content in You and You alone. May each person trust in You and learn how that trust enables and empowers them to rejoice evermore, to pray without ceasing, to give thanks in everything, and to live in the power of the Holy Spirit. Thank you, Lord, for the atoning blood of Jesus Christ, which provides the way for me to approach your throne of grace and present these requests. Amen.

2006-11-18T11:05:00.000-06:00

This picture, by looking at Regan, must be from June of 2005, and was taken when we celebrated Keaton's 4th birthday (he is now 5). My dad, Billy Wayne Riley, was born on this day (November 18th) in 1938 as the youngest of 7 children. He was only one of four that survived infancy.

Now, 68 years later, he is still going strong, giving great fatherly advice, loving on his grandkids, and traveling in an RV quite frequently with my mom. (They're actually in Florida right now visiting relatives.) It's a lot of fun to see how much joy they receive from our children. They've been married for 48 years.

Happy Birthday, Dad. May you get to see many more and watch your grandchildren continue to grow in wisdom, grace and truth. "For God did not give us a spirit of fear, but of power, and of love, and of a sound mind." 2 Timothy 1:7.

2006-11-17T13:49:00.000-06:00

One of the things my wife and I have really failed at over the last few years of "busy-ness" with jobs and three children has been real conversation. And, to say it in a very vernacular way, that is some serious scary. Imagine, this is my marriage, the person with whom God has created a spiritual union. The person I've pledged to love and encourage over all others. But, the reality of life, as I was ordering it, put that person way down the list of communication, time, and effort.

I see it throughout our society, too. Not only is there a high divorce rate, including among Christian couples, but in marriages that have stayed together, most people don't know how to communicate. Have you ever watched a couple at dinner in a restaurant? They have little to nothing to say. More communication goes on at their table when the server is present than at any other time during the entire "ordeal." And, this is supposed to be fun? What about how many couples just let their children's lives absorb their own? Again, they don't communicate about their own feelings, jobs or lives; instead, their communication is either to or through their kids or about their kids.

This is way more scary than Halloween!!!

Here is something Tara and I have recently implemented in our daily lives. It's a simple "sharing exercise." And, the first time we did it we were scared to death that we simply couldn't do it. In fact, we thought the times prescribed sounded like days rather than minutes. Here's the gist, and I challenge you to try it with your spouse or, if single, with your best friend.

1. One person is the sharer and one is the listener.
2. When listening you are not to let your mind wander or think about how you might respond. Listen with your eyes and ears.
3. Your goal is not to agree - rather it is simply to communicate your own thoughts, feelings, attitudes and opinions.
4. Do not criticize, respond, defend, or apologize. Listen only to understand. Do not look for flaws. Simply try to understand.
5. Listen and limit responses to the sharer's message to either "I understand" or "I don't understand," and perhaps a question to ask what the sharer means by his or her words.
6. Use "I" sentences and not "you" sentences.
7. the MINIMUM amount of time for such sharing is 20 minutes! Find a place where you won't be interrupted and turn off phones.

We have, with practice, begun to see that 20 minutes flies by and quickly becomes 30, 45 and even 60 minutes. We also have realized that if our priorities make such times impossible to have that we need to reorder our priorities. God tells us to seek first His kingdom and His righteousness and that then all the rest will be added unto us, but all too often we just chase after the rest and forget His priorities. We are going to endeavor never to do that again.

2006-11-16T15:24:00.000-06:00

HUMILITY

Loren Cunningham recently told me this: "Humility is choosing to be known for who you really are. Humility is transparency." Can you imagine the difference it would have made for Ted Haggard if he had chosen transparency for all of these years rather than having a secret that he kept in his heart? Can you imagine how it would change your own life if you lived a transparent life in Christ? The traps I've fallen into could have been so easily avoided. Oh, Lord, please give us hearts that honestly stand before you, recognizing who we are in You, unashamed and full of integrity!

This thought humbled me today. God commands me to rejoice always, pray without ceasing, always be thankful, always be content, to love, to forgive, to do nothing that impugns His character and nature. Yet, when I look into my heart I often find an angry and ungrateful heart, a heart that lacks contentedness, a heart that seeks his own rather than God's desires. I find myself grumbling when I feel slighted by another or when I don't get my expectations met. All the while I quickly forget God's command to rejoice and be thankful.

So, I'm trying to learn to be more transparent. I've found that I've got messages written on my heart that confuse sinful pride with feeling worthy of love because of the saving work of Christ. Please understand that as I try to put these feelings down into words I am afraid much will be lost because it is very difficult to describe with my mouth and mind what is going on in my heart.

Here is what I think I've come to understand. I often sabotage my own "loveableness" because I have this false humility that says I can't be worthy of God's or anyone else's love because if I feel that I am worthy of such love I am being prideful. So, I act in a way to sustain this belief, conducting myself in a way that validates my belief that I should be unworthy of love. This results in me feeling all sorry for myself because I believe no one loves me (or they really don't like me much because of my silliness), and, in desperation, I feel compelled to tell everyone how great I am because I do still need their love and appreciation. This results in people seeing me as being prideful and/or a person who doesn't need others and intensifies my feelings of worthlessness as the distance between me and others grows. Although I feel "glad" that I'm "not being prideful" I also feel miserable that I'm so worthless and that "nobody loves me." This is a vicious closed loop in my heart.

So, I like David, will continue to ask the Lord to find these offensive ways in my heart where I believe lies or partial truths rather than resting wholeheartedly on His perfect truth. Just like the song we all learned as children, "Jesus loves me, this I know, for the Bible tells me so...." "[T]he Father himself loves you because you have loved me and have believed that I came from God." John 16:27. I need to represent more of God and His truth to my heart, meditating thereon and storing His words up in my heart like Mary. And, like David and Solomon, I want to continue to commune with my heart and let God do His amazing work of sanctification in my heart and life.

2006-11-14T13:08:00.000-06:00

Being like Jesus is an incredible challenge. I pondered it in the wake of the Razorbacks win over Tennessee this past weekend. What does God desire for us? He desires the very best for us. And, He knows that we will receive that very best when we love Him with all our heart, soul and strength and when we love others as we love ourselves.

What does that really mean? I'm not sure I have that all figured out, but one of the things God has been showing me that it means is that we can have no idols in our hearts.

When David cried out to God to search his heart and see if there is any "wicked" or "offensive" way in him, the word has in it the concept of an idol. Any high place or idol in our heart must be torn down. We must have God as the sole object of worship. There can be no distractions from Him. That is the life Jesus led, and it is the life we must lead. We must not let anything intoxicate us, drug us, distract us or capture us except the magnificence of our Father in Heaven.

Why did the Razorback football game get me thinking about this? Good question. As I examined my heart and asked God to do the same He showed me that there was a time when I would let football season be a drug and a distraction. I would watch football games to escape the misery I had in my life. It was an "acceptable" way to keep my mind from thinking about how far I was falling short of the glory of God.

But that was not the sole lesson He wanted me to see. He also showed me how easily I could swing to a different drug of choice: pride. He reminded me of the "spiritual" pride I developed in my first few weeks here at the University of the Nations. You see, the transition into missions support here really did inundate me with a new life and desire for God. And, much of my former life really was forgotten. That first weekend here I not only didn't watch any football (we have no TV anyway), I didn't even remember that college football was happening and had no idea what the Hogs were doing until friends and family from home told me about the game. I was somewhat smugly impressed with myself. And, I found myself drifting from a worship of God and God alone to a desire to promote the religious success I was having.

I so want to love God with everything I have. It is a very difficult pursuit. I see at every turn how easily I let any and everything distract me from the only goal worth pursuing. I pray God will continue to reveal Himself and His desires for my life to me. I am so glad that He promises to give good gifts to His children and that He says that we should simply ask for those good gifts like wisdom and the filling of the Holy Spirit.

Oh Father, please give me wisdom as I desperately seek You and fill me with your Holy Spirit. Thank you that I can approach your throne and ask you for these things through the blood of Jesus Christ, my Lord and Savior. Amen.

2006-11-09T19:32:00.000-06:00

Don't lose your heart trying to save your mind; you will lose both in the process.

2006-11-08T13:50:00.000-06:00

A CALL TO PRAYER

Yesterday, during our staff meeting here in Kona we prayed for the Body of Christ (universal), our campus, New Life Church, and for the Haggard family. It was a great time of prayer. I felt like God gave me two words from that time. First, we should all, as Christians, pray for our churches and fellowships that the things that are done and said "privately" that are not consistent with the nature and character of God would be made public so that any who lack integrity will be brought to repentance. Second, we need to pray desperately for reconciliation, repentance and revival in the Body of Christ. PRAY!!!

Brothers, if someone is caught in a sin, you who are spiritual should restore him gently. But watch yourself, or you also may be tempted. Carry each other's burdens, and in this way you will fulfill the law of Christ. If anyone thinks he is something when he is nothing, he deceives himself. Each one should test his own actions. Then he can take pride in himself, without comparing himself to somebody else, for each one should carry his own load.

Anyone who receives instruction in the word must share all good things with his instructor. Do not be deceived: God cannot be mocked. A man reaps what he sows. The one who sows to please his sinful nature, from that nature will reap destruction; the one who sows to please the Spirit, from the Spirit will reap eternal life. Let us not become weary in doing good, for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up. Therefore, as we have opportunity, let us do good to all people, especially to those who belong to the family of believers. Galatians 6:1-10.

2006-11-06T18:21:00.000-06:00

THE "HEART" OF THE BIBLE

I hate to troll for comments, but I am very interested in hearing from some of you theologians (and from those who aren't!) on this topic.

Clearly, we all have hearts. The dictionary defines it as "a hollow muscular organ of vertebrate animals that by its rhythmic contraction acts as a force pump maintaining the circulation of the blood." See heart. But is that really the "heart" of the bible? Heart is mentioned over 800 times in the bible, which is about 4 times more often than the mind is mentioned.

Did you know that God grieved in His heart? And it was all because of the evil of our hearts. Genesis 6:5-6. We of course are called to love God with all our heart and to keep His commandments on our heart. Deuteronomy 6:4-6. It is in our hearts that we develop pride and forget the Lord. Deuteronomy 8:11-17.

Fearful hearts are contagious. Deuteronomy 20:8. Our hearts can be circumcised. Deuteronomy 30:6. Drunkenness brings a merry heart. 1 Samuel 25:36. And King Solomon, when granted his wish, asked for an "understanding heart," and God granted him his prayer by giving him "largeness of heart." 1 Kings 3:9 & 1 Kings 4:29.

Solomon and David both had conversations with their hearts. Psalm 4:4 and Ecclesiastes 1:16. Imagine that, some might thing you crazy, talking to yourself that way. :) And we know that the pure in heart are blessed and that where we put our treasure our heart follows. Matthew 5:8 & Matthew 6:21. We can harden our hearts (Hebrews 3) and God can harden our hearts as well (Pharaoh). One last example is that the Word of God judges our hearts, penetrating deep within. Hebrews 4:12.

So, getting to my point with this brief survey of a few of the verses on the heart of the bible, what does this really mean? What is the heart of the bible? How do we talk to our hearts? How is it that only God can discern the heart and not even we, the "owner" of our hearts, can discern it? Jeremiah 17:9-10. We cannot even depend on our own heart; we must trust in Him alone. Have you ever studied the "heart" of the Bible? What do you think it means to love the Lord with all our hearts? What really is the heart???

2006-11-02T16:53:00.000-06:00

KONA I.T.

Missions. What is it? Can you be a missionary even though your career, drive, giftings, passions, etc. aren't for preaching, singing, and teaching the bible? Check out this website: Kona I.T.

The Kona I.T. department is all about serving missions globally with information systems and technology. As you might imagine, every organization in the 21st Century has a huge need for people gifted with computer skills, whether programming or otherwise. As a result, one family came to the University of the Nations over 3 years ago to build an IT department that could support the campus. Chong Ho and Kris Won (and their three young children) left their 8000 square foot home in Maryland, just outside Washington, D.C., and began volunteering (making no money) for the University of the Nations. In the past 3 years he has built a department of 12 people, implemented several new systems, all of which communicate together, and developed a global vision that is amazing and God glorifying!

The picture above is of a computer lab that one of his team put together in South Africa. Now, the IT Department is looking to build additional labs all around the world. Why? Because they can put these labs into impoverished communities, teaching computer and job skills to the people, and help the local people develop skills that will bring prosperity to their communities. Meanwhile, they will be sharing Christ with the people and giving them an ability to improve the quality of their lives while teaching them about eternal life, joy, and hope.

Now, most of the year, the people who serve as IT professionals at the University of the Nations in Kona will be working on the big Island of Hawaii doing exactly what they may be doing now, developing and maintaining software and systems for businesses, but, as God directs, they will also take those skills to places like South Africa, Fiji, other African nations, China, and other places around the globe. This is an amazing vision that we can all get excited about. (John and Jeff Parker, what do you think???!!!)

Please pray for Chong Ho and his team. As you look at their website, consider whether you could support them. Remember that many of these professionals could make in one hour of consulting in the states their staff fees for one month of food here in Kona ($250.00). Yet, they have given up that kind of income to come and support the work of the Great Commission here and are now working solely as volunteers. Also, if you have computer skills at all, consider coming to Kona and participate in the IT Discipleship Training School that will begin in January. When it may be 30 degrees or lower wherever you are, it will be 80 here.

2006-10-29T02:27:00.000-06:00

PERSEVERANCE

God is absolutely amazing. I wish I could claim credit for this day, because it was a day perfectly designed for God to use Tara and me to teach our children about perseverance. It's like I designed this and wrote an excellent book around raising my boys, like the one above: But, no, God gets all the glory for creating the perfect day for a lesson in perseverance.

One of the first main sights greeting us as we neared our destination was this. If you look behind the three large ones up close, you will see that the ones further back have lost some of their arms, are rusty, and, what you cannot see, is that none of them are working. The purpose for which these huge windmills were designed, on one of the windiest places in America, is left unfulfilled because none of the machines are still in working order.

This location is almost to South Point on the Big Island. It is the southernmost tip of the United States. It is REMOTE. We saw few cars, a few fisherman, a few houses with some resident goats (click on the funky tree to see them), and no signs of merchandising or anything open to the public for purchase.
We drove past this eerie sight, eerie because it seemed like a place for a horror flick, a display of death. Whomever was in charge of maintaining this excellent producer of electricity for the Big Island failed to persevere in their task.

We were following a wonderful guidebook to our destination. If you ever make it here to see the active volcanoes or to enjoy a step back to a more laid back America, please purchase or borrow this book. It will take you step by step through everything, especially if you are really good at following directions.

That is where I got off track. :) The book described a parking lot, and, we drove down a one lane bumpy road that used to be two lanes but, again, a lack of perseverance and care has resulted in the road becoming difficult for cars that don't have 4WD. And, we found a parking lot. There were many fisherman and other cars there, so I assumed it was the place where we would have to park and begin hiking. You see, we have a little PT Cruiser to use while we are here. It is not made for 4WD roads. And, past the "parking lot" I thought I was at were roads only for 4WD vehicles. We knew we'd need to hike, and the book told us it was about a 2.25 mile hike.

I loaded Regan, my two-year old into a backpack (she's close to 40 pounds) and then Tara, Tanner (7) and Keaton (5) all had to fend for themselves.
What fun!!! We are off on what will be a lengthy hike for my two boys, but what a great time we will all have as a family! Meanwhile, interestingly enough, the video we watched the night previous on our laptop and then again in the car was a Veggie Tales video about... guess....

Perseverance.

Isn't it amazing how God knows just what to be preparing you for????!!!!

So, off we go. 2.25 miles one way shouldn't be too bad. We'll rest at our destination and then return the 2.25 miles after a refreshing dip in the ocean.

We hiked for 40 minutes along the ocean front on this southernmost tip of the United States. It looked like this.
And we were having a grand time. The noise of huge crashing waves (there are no breakers on this coastline), the clear blue skies, the occasional sea birds crying, and the steadiness of feet padding along. Unfortunately, after 40 minutes of hiking along so happily, as we topped one hill we were greeted with this sight.

If you click on the picture and look between two of the vehicles you will see a gate. Well, the book tells you about this gate as the marker where the 2.25 miles begins. So, we had been hiking along for 40 minutes, over a mile, to be greeted by the fact that we had at least another 2.25 miles to go. We don't want to go back; we can't. You see, we are headed to a beach that is the only one like it in the world. It has GREEN sand, made from the mineral olivine. The sand is a mixture of lava and olivine, so it has green and black sand particles all throughout it. My wife is such a trooper and has so much determination and perseverance. So, we march on. Regan's forty pound pack is heavy, and I've been suffering from a neck/shoulder injury, but I definitely do not want to stop now. And, amazingly, I watch my five-year old suck it up and take off!

Enough of the build... We finished and were greeted by these incredible views. Please enjoy them because we finished strong to obtain these photos and a little bit of the mystical green sand, even a little in Tara's ears, in the girls' bathing suits, on our feet, etc. :)

The below, if you look closely, shows Tara about to be buried under a huge wave.Still smiling, even though we are getting ready to make the extended journey back...
Looking back after we leave...

STILL GOING....
AND GOING.... (click to see them off in distance)
Regan had it pretty good. Dad decided to take a break. We were almost there...
After all of this, which we estimated ended up being about 7 miles of hiking in 3.5 hours (we did stop at the beach for a couple of hours for a total of almost 6 hours), we drove the 60 miles back to Kona, treating ourselves along the way with an excellent find of a restaurant. (Oh, i forgot to mention, we didn't plan ahead well and ended up not having lunch at all...my poor kiddoes). The restaurant is the first Mexican restaurant we've found here that actually tasted Mexican (not that we've tried many, but there aren't many around either). It was Senor Billy's located in Captain Cook, Hawaii. Ha. What a name and a place for good Mexican.
Oh, and, besides the fact that the entire day was filled with lessons on perseverance, including ol' Larry and Bob chortling in our backseat all the way, these are some of the verses that God keeps hitting me over the head with of late:
Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses, let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles, and let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us. Let us fix our eyes on Jesus, the author and perfecter of our faith, who for the joy set before him endured the cross, scorning its shame, and sat down at the right hand of the throne of God. Consider him who endured such opposition from sinful men, so that you will not grow weary and lose heart. Hebrews 12:1-3.
I suppose I better take note. I know I want to finish strong, just as my family did today.
Buenos noches!

2006-10-26T21:16:00.000-05:00

Earthquake cleanup in Makapala

Here I go again, living vicariously through the amazing work of God in the lives of others and reporting on the miraculous hand of God here at the University of the Nations. I received the below email about 2 minutes ago and immediately felt led by the Lord to share it with you. Please pray for Jonathan Stoner and the Compassion DTS. We were so moved by Jonathan's work that we have supported him in the past and I would challenge all my readers to pray about whether they can support his ministry or the ministry of the Compassion DTS. (He is the one standing in the back in the picture above, second from the right.) I would be glad to facilitate such giving (and yes, we rely solely on the support of others for our ministry, too, but God is plenty big enough to take care of us all). Read more about the Compassion DTS here.

Here is the email I received from Jonathan:

Hello friends and family,

This last weekend our Compassion DTS worked at one of the Ironman Aid Stations on the coastal highway. Our job was to supply Gatorade, Cola, Water and food to the athletes as they rode by on their bikes. The difficult part is that the bikers are all going about 20 miles an hour or more so you have to start running before they reach you and then time the hand off of the food or drink properly so they don't drop it. I'm happy to report that I only had two Gatorade drops of the thousand plus athletes. I was so psyched up about the experience that I didn't stop running the entire 4 hours except for a 15 minute lunch break. My calves suffered and for the next couple of days I could only limp around our Makapala base.

This week the lectures have been focused on the cross and the Lordship of Christ in our lives. The whole school has been experiencing breakthroughs in better understanding God's character and nature but most of all in receiving His abundant love and discovering our identity as sons and daughters of the King. Our corporate times together as a school have been overwhelmingly good in every way. We are still building bridges into the Makapala community and helping our neighbors as they work on their houses, businesses and churches.

Then this morning at breakfast I felt compelled to gather a group together to pray before class. As we prayed the Holy Spirit gave the group Scriptures about sacrificial giving, the one he gave me was 2 Corinthians 9: 6-15: "Remember this: Whoever sows sparingly will also reap sparingly, and whoever sows generously will also reap generously. Each man should give what he has decided in his heart to give, not reluctantly or under compulsion, for God loves a cheerful giver. And God is able to make all grace abound to you, so that in all things at all times, having all that you need, you will abound in every good work. As it is written: 'He has scattered abroad his gifts to the poor; his righteousness endures forever.' Now he who supplies seed to the sower and bread for food will also supply and increase your store of seed and will enlarge the harvest of your righteousness. You will be made rich in every way so that you can be generous on every occasion, and through us your generosity will result in thanksgiving to God.

This service that you perform is not only supplying the needs of God's people but is also overflowing in many expressions of thanks to God. Because of the service by which you have proved yourselves, men will praise God for the obedience that accompanies your confession of the gospel of Christ, and for your generosity in sharing with them and with everyone else. And in their prayers for you their hearts will go out to you, because of the surpassing grace God has given you. Thanks be to God for his indescribable gift!"

During class I shared this passage with the whole school and many others came forward confirming that God was asking us to give to others even as many of us are praying for the funds for Outreach. The rest of the morning resulted in a spontaneous time of giving clothing, electronics, cash, and other possessions that were hard to part with. God told me to give me my iPod to one of our students who had been praying for one for a long time. He just kept looking at me and smiling incredulously. After we gave what we felt we were supposed to give several people reported back to the group what God had done. A funny thing happened as the students and staff shared, I began laughing and weeping at the same time just overcome as I pictured Jesus smiling and laughing at the cheerful obedience of His kids. It was a morning that I hope never to forget. I am still trusting in the faithfulness of God for room and board for December and the 6-month AIDS Outreach to Uganda. Please keep me and the Compassion DTS in your prayers!

God is laughing,

Jonathan Stoner
University of the Nations
75-5851 Kuakini Hwy #5
Kailua-Kona, HI 96740

2006-10-25T20:42:00.000-05:00

Here I am at the University of the Nations working in missions support by helping with some administrative management at the largest YWAM base in the world. The difficult part of that is manifold; for example, (1) it isn't really what I ultimately want to do from a ministry standpoint (but God has confirmed in so many ways that this is where He is putting me for now); (2) it isn't nearly as exciting as telling someone you are headed off to some uncharted island or African nation; and (3) it is hard for people to catch a vision of supporting someone who is in Hawaii doing "legal" things or managing people or projects. So, sometimes I feel like I don't have much to tell people about my work here, at least not something that seems very important.

But, on occasion I do get to see some amazing ministry work being done by others, and I sure love sharing about that. Below is an email from friends of ours, Nick and Jen Greener, who have been in Fiji for the past four weeks doing missions work. I hope it inspires you as it has me. It reminded me of one of the reasons why we are here: to support people doing work just like the Greeners.

Greetings from Lautoka!

We’re getting settled here in Fiji. The people we’ve met have been warm and very welcoming, and YWAM has some great projects that we will be a part of throughout our time here. YWAM has a “drop-in” center for neighborhood kids here in Lautoka that we’ve all been working at—Christian loves it, and they all look forward to “Auntie Jen” helping them with a new craft each day. Nick has been working with a similar program in a squatter settlement built around the dump at the edge of the city, though instead of crafts we have a focus on teaching some basic health and hygiene skills that are so badly needed there. It's hard to describe how miserable the conditions are there-- and even more difficult considering the number of kids that live in and around the dump settlement. We’ve also been able to help with some of the ministries run out of the prison and a home for disabled children (Christian was confused and sad-- he asked to pray for a new little friend he met there "who didn't know how to stomp"). All in all, we have been getting a great amount of experience and exposure to different types of missions work.

We leave on October 24th for two weeks on one of the smaller “outer islands” in a village called Teci. There are about 200 people there, good water (when it rains) and we’ve been told that there is a small generator in the village that provides a couple hours of electricity a day to one of the buildings. It should be exciting—and as is the custom there, Nick will be expected to catch dinner for the family each day. We may come back thinner.

One of the main purposes for our time there will be to begin plans for a drinking water system that will allow for consistent potable water for the village (not just during the rainy season). If the plans come together well we may be able to have a YWAM team come in to begin construction within the next few months.

When we leave Teci we will work at the YWAM base in Suva (the capital of Fiji) up until Thanksgiving—then we’ll go back to Kona to determine where our long-term missions work will take place. There are still a number of possibilities as to where we will be for the next couple years. We are very much hoping to be in place and settled at the beginning of the new year though—living in one room as a family has made us appreciate how nice even a small apartment would be!

We'll give you all an update when we get back from Teci-- we'd appreciate your prayers for health, safety, and plenty of fish. We are having a great time, even with all the challenges that this brings. It's been fun to watch our own kids grow here! Ava is crawling, and seems almost ready to walk. Christian is doing great, and we're all healthy after a tough couple weeks when we first got here. We've got mosquito nets, medicine ready in case of scabies (unfortunately very common here), and we've taken our pills to help prevent elephantitis. Christian took the pills for elephantitis, but wants to know if we can somehow get tiger-itis for him. (end of email)

I love it. The way God works through people following His call. The way He works in the lives of those people following His call. How he can have a zillion things going on all at the same time, for His purpose and His plan, and it is all for the best for those who love Him and are called according to His purpose. WOW! Isn't God AMAZING? PRAISEWORTHY? THE BESTEST!

2006-10-24T14:13:00.000-05:00

Well worth the read: Molly on our favorite alien, Jesus

2006-10-24T03:23:00.000-05:00

I am so glad I have Jesus. This past week was a very long one. It is cliche, but , as I have gotten older, most days, weeks and years really have seemed shorter. But, after last Sunday's earthquake (which I have since learned lasted 60 SECONDS (pictures in a couple of posts somewhere below)), a week during which my wife, Tara, was at the Ironman Sports Medicine conference much of the days, the arrival of one of Tara's best friends from Arkansas, Charla Roberts, and the Ironman Triathlon itself, time went by very slowly. Everything with the exception of the Earthquake was wonderful, and, typically such "busy-ness" would make time go by quickly. Instead, the unsettling nature of surviving a 6.7 earthquake made time crawl.

I was thinking about 60 seconds of the world shaking. Imagine being in your car with your children, at least two of which have started crying in anger at one another screaming loudly, and, instead of doing anything, just let them go at it for 60 seconds. While you are at it, turn on the radio loudly and, if you have a DVD player in the car let it go, too. Or, take a dip in your bathtub, pool, or lake and go under and hold your breath for 60 seconds. Or just do it right now. Time yourself and hold your breath for 60 seconds. See how long it takes for your digital clock to go from 7:07 to 7:08.

While Charla has been here I've slept in the bunk beds with the kids. The first night I did it, I woke up in the middle of the night and thought we were having an aftershock or another earthquake. The bed was shaking. Then, I heard my oldest son above me and realized he was just turning over. The trauma after an earthquake makes you think everything is an aftershock. Loud thuds, imagined shakes, beds moving because someone else is moving it, or simply someone shaking a table to get your goat, all of these things can be traumatic.

God teaches us through these things, and as I've written before we definitely see His power, His might, His sovereignty and His grace. This week I also had a time with Him going through some scriptures that some great friends of ours sent our way in a wonderful card of encouragement (Thanks Tommy and Lydia Tedford--I think they may have all been Lydia's handiwork). One of the scriptures was from Hebrews 12. It was so appropriate in light of the Ironman. I just had to share it here, from the NKJV, because I liked its use of the word "chastening":

"Therefore we also, since we are surrounded by so great a cloud of witnesses, let us lay aside every weight, and the sin which so easily ensnares us, and let us run with endurance the race that is set before us, looking unto Jesus (I love how the NASB says here "fixing our eyes on Jesus"), the author and finisher of our faith, who for the joy that was set before Him endured the cross, despising the shame, and has sat down at the right hand of the throne of God. (Imagine swimming 2.4 miles, biking 112 miles, and running 26.2 miles. It would be so much easier if at the end you knew you would get to embrace Jesus in His fullness. The reality is that much of life is just that hard, if not harder, and the other reality is that He is right there embracing you all along!) For consider Him who endured such hostility from sinners against Himself, lest you become weary and discouraged in your souls. You have not yet resisted to bloodshed, striving against sin. And you have forgotten the exhortation which speaks to you as to sons:

“ My son, do not despise the chastening of the LORD, Nor be discouraged when you are rebuked by Him; For whom the LORD loves He chastens, And scourges every son whom He receives.” If you endure chastening, God deals with you as with sons; for what son is there whom a father does not chasten? But if you are without chastening, of which all have become partakers, then you are illegitimate and not sons. Furthermore, we have had human fathers who corrected us, and we paid them respect. Shall we not much more readily be in subjection to the Father of spirits and live? For they indeed for a few days chastened us as seemed best to them, but He for our profit, that we may be partakers of His holiness. Now no chastening seems to be joyful for the present, but painful; nevertheless, afterward it yields the peaceable fruit of righteousness to those who have been trained by it." Hebrews 12:1-11

Oh, the joy thinking of that yield of "the peaceable fruit of righteousness"!!!! We truly can endure this race. Christ endured the race to the cross and crossed the finish line with that groan that echoes throughout all of time: "IT IS FINISHED!"

I loved how the announcer of the Ironman would announce each finisher calling them a winner. Even better was when his voice rang out across the crowd with this: "[insert name], you are an Ironman!!" I so longed to hear him say "Bryan Riley, you are an Ironman!" It helped me realize how wonderful that day will be when He says "Well done, good and faithful servant!" I can so understand, even better now, because of listening to the Ironman announcer, how incredible that day will be. I pray you will fix your eyes on Jesus, fully realize the joy set before you, and with that fixation and joy, run on and finish strong. Let now anything distract you and make you a doubleminded person.

Focus...
Depend...
Worship...
Run...
Laugh...
Enjoy...
Taste...

He is enough.

2006-10-21T22:27:00.000-05:00

MORE SIGHTS OF THE 2006 IRONMAN TRIATHLON

Wow. What a day!!! We have had a lot of fun. We ended up preparing for the runners from 11 until about 2, when the first place runner finally made it after more than 7 hours of swimming, biking and running. We handed out water, gatorade, ice, sponges, Power Gel, oranges, bananas, and yelling our voices out until almost 4 p.m. here. It's 5:30 here now, and we are letting our kids rest a little while doing some mundane things like laundry before we head back out to watch more racing at the finish line. Also, Tara's best friend from Fayetteville, Arkansas, is flying in tonight and we will be picking her up.

REMEMBER THAT YOU CAN ZOOM IN ON ANY PICTURE BY CLICKING ON IT!

Is that the first runner???

No, just me horsing around before the first runners arrived.

The real Ironman is below. Unfortunately, we missed his face in this picture because he missed the drink and, as you might imagine, had a few choice words for the young man holding the drink. What was fun for Tanner, our seven-year old, is that he stood at the beginning of the aid station handing our sponges (as did Keaton, our five-year old), and This Ironman took two sponges from Tanner!

Runner # 2 goes briskly by -->

The Ironman In third at our station.

The woman in first at our station.

The next two are fun shots shortly later. We are probably still in the top ten finishers here. You can see that both boys just handed out sponges, with water dripping down in one, and in the other you see the pure joy Tanner is experiencing at helping these runners finish strong.

Click on this one and see the ice raining down.

What a day!

2006-10-21T14:22:00.000-05:00

THE EARLY SIGHTS OF THE 2006 IRONMAN TRIATHLON

It is amazing how nothing seems to stop the human heart. Just 6 days after a huge earthquake shook up the Big Island, the World Championship Ironman Triathlon got off to a smooth start by the pier in Kailua-Kona, Hawaii. Almost 1800 athletes began there 140.6 mile adventure in the ocean with a 2.4 mile swim.

After that daunting task alone, they hop on their bikes, still salty and wet, to begin the 112 mile bike from Kona to Hawi and back.

None of that is enough for these athletes.

After all of that they begin running. Not just a little run - they take off for a full marathon of 26.2 miles.

We woke the kids at 5:45 a.m. so that we could walk down to the starting line and see the racers off. We watched the swim begin and then went up for a pancake breakfast that was being done by a local youth group and church for their mission trips. As we walked back home we watched the cyclists in their first few miles. We will be leaving shortly to volunteer at the aid station located at the 13 mile marker of the marathon. We will be there from 11 a.m. till 3 p.m., and we will see the very first athletes (all the winners) there during those times, because only the fastest will make it there before 3. We will be cutting up fruit and preparing the aid station for the athletes so that they can grab and go as quickly as possible.

2006-10-18T14:59:00.000-05:00

Sunday, October 15th, I was sitting at my computer working on this post when the earthquake shook us to our core. The electricity went out and thus my laptop lost my work. If the ground shakes again as I write it this time, I will have something to think about...

The image to the right comes from a prayer booklet that I wrote about on Friday, October 13th. Paul and Susi Childers are YWAM missionaries with an incredible ministry to be "Voices for the Voiceless." Paul is from New Zealand and Susi is from Germany. The prayer booklet hits 30 tough issues of gender injustice. On Sunday, I was praying through this issue: AIDS.

All too often I have thought of AIDS as someone else's problem or thought of it as not something we have to worry about. I had little compassion for the suffering it was causing. I have had to question myself about whether my attitude about AIDS developed because of a judgmental spirit against homosexuals and the association of AIDS with homosexual behavior. Regardless of the cause of AIDS, however, men, women, and children are afflicted with this disease, and each of them were created in His image. We are commanded to love not just those who think or act like us, but all humanity, and to be the hands and feet of Christ to them.

Did you know that AIDS has killed more than 25 million people since 1981? That's a million per year. Looking at World Book, WWII was the war that killed more than any other, and it involved an estimated 17 million military deaths. Did you know that Africa has 12 million orphans who are orphans because of AIDS? Did you know that 43% of those infected with HIV are women?

We must be praying about this. We must have compassion on these people. There was a song Steve Camp wrote that always brought me to my knees because it asked a question that I never heard anyone ask in my "Christian" circles; frankly, I'm not sure any cared to think of such a thing. He asked whether I had tasted the tears of those who were afflicted with AIDS.

Have you? Or are AIDS victims the modern day lepers? Better yet, are homosexuals and other such "sinners" lepers to most Christians? Have you ever ministered to "such as these." Pray that God would intervene against this epidemic and that a cure would be found. Pray that people, including people like you, would be called upon to teach biblical truths to show that there is a very easy way to avoid contracting the disease, at least sexually. And look for other ways to minister to the broken hearted, not just those afflicted with AIDS, but with any social issue that you may have avoided in the past.

2006-10-18T13:20:00.000-05:00

We take so many things for granted, particularly in the United States. With our move to Kona, we moved into a "home" that is less than 1/5th of the size of our home in Arkansas. That means, since we have a five-member family, we now live in less space together than we each individually had before. This sounds drastic, but we still have more than we need, and it is more a comment on how excessive our place in Arkansas is.

In the aftermath of recovering emotionally from the earthquake Sunday, we suddenly realized how thankful we were that we didn't have TVs, china, glass frames on the walls, glassware, etc., because all that fell to the ground was unbreakable and of little value.

Our 600 square feet still has running water, beds (one for each of us!), sheets, a roof that doesn't leak, electricity, a bathroom (with a tub and shower! some of the places don't have tubs), a refrigerator, a microwave, and the love of God and of a family.

I say all this to laugh at the fact that we were inconvenienced last night and this morning. The rooms beneath us had a plumbing issue. As a result, we had to discontinue use of our bathroom. Understand, all this means is that we have to walk across a courtyard to some public restrooms (public to the U of N) no more than probably 100 feet at the most. But, at the same time, when you wake up in the middle of the night or in the morning needing to go to the bathroom, this means taking the time to put on some semblance of respectable clothing in the event someone else is in that public place at that time and making that short walk. You might even glance at your now longer hair, which has likely had a party overnight, grab a hat, shake out the mental cobwebs, etc. In the big picture it is nothing, and, the public bathrooms are still clean, with running water and electricity.

It reminded me, though, of how we take things for granted. How spoiled we are. An hour south of here, on the island, there is a community called Ocean View. The community has about 500 Marshallese living there. They live in huts/homes they have built from scrap and they do not have running water. Yes, this is in the U.S. But, they were displaced from their native Island and live in third world conditions here. It is a vivid reminder of how much we have and how much we can give as well. The base recently took a team there and are building water tanks for the people there so that they can have their own source of water, rather than trying to pay the $150 it takes to get a few thousand gallons of water shipped in.

God really is amazing and so gracious to us.

2006-10-17T15:27:00.000-05:00

Tara is amazing, as so many of you know. I am seeing more of it every day here. I wanted to share with you the above picture of what she will be doing over the next few weeks. She will be doing three one-hour presentations of her trade to the schools here on campus and then a three-hour presentation to public and private school educators from all over the island on November 18th, which is what the above picture is all about. Pray for her and rejoice with me that God graced me with a "wife of noble character."

2006-10-16T19:11:00.000-05:00

SAHARAWI PEOPLE GROUP

The Saharawi people are one of the least reached people groups as determined by the Joshua Project (http://www.joshuaproject.net/peopctry.php?rop3=108512&rog3=MO). Originally, the Saharawi were desert nomads who traveled by camel. Today, they can be found in the desert in southern Morocco, in the Western Sahara region, in the North of Mauritania, in Algerian refugee camps, and in the Canary Islands. A sub-group of the Moors, they are of mixed Berber, Arab, and black African descent. Some Saharawi are herdsmen, others are traders, and still others are warriors. However, all speak an Arabic dialect called Hassaniya and Spanish. In addition, their religion, way of life, and dress are Arabic in flavor and style.

They are Islamic in belief, but have more openness to other beliefs than many Islamic adherents. It is unknown how many, if any, evangelical Christians there are among the Saharawi. They live in a culture of war as there is a longstanding conflict between Morocco and the Saharawi people.

The map below will show you the area of Africa where most of the Saharawi live.

Now, why am I writing about the Saharawi? Well, one of the professors here at the University of the Nations, Robert Evans (not the Bob Evans of restaurant fame) has been asked to attend a conference of Saharawi Imams in Algeria. Imam means leader, and the religious Imams are the religious leaders of an Islamic people. Please understand the significance of this. Robert has been asked as a Christian Bible teacher (he teaches Greek and Hebrew here) to come and present the story of the Book (then entire OT and NT) as seen through a Christian's eyes, with Christ as the focus. They want to hear from a Christian about the God of their "Father, Abraham." Robert also speaks Spanish.

This is taking place November 11-13 in Algeria. Here's the deal. All missions here in YWAM are individually supported and support raised. Robert not only is having to raise the money to go to Algeria, but he also has to raise money to provide a substitute Greek teacher while he is gone. A substitute (who also is a missionary) has already agreed to come, but Robert needs money or frequent flier miles to buy a plane ticket for the substitute and money for his trip, as well. I am asking you to consider sending support for this incredible opportunity! I am trying to help him find his way there for this amazing opportunity.

Can you imagine?? A Christian teaching the Bible to 150 "priests/pastors" of the Islamic faith in a people group considered to be one of the least reached people groups in the world? In addition, this is a people group burdened with war and political unrest, ripe for finding the one true Mediator and Reconciliation that Jesus Christ alone can bring!

If you would like to give to this cause, buying a plane ticket, buying part of a plane ticket or any such gift, please contact me and I will provide details as to how you can do so.

2006-10-15T20:49:00.000-05:00

I had just hung up the phone with my wife, Tara, when the Earthquake hit. I had been trying to type in a post about the plight of AIDS and how we should be much more passionate and compassionate about our response to it. I will take that back up again later.

Being from Arkansas and never feeling anything like that, I really don't know what to say about it. Each second the ground shook seemed to last much longer than a second. I didn't notice that things were falling to the floor off of shelves and desks, because all i could think was, are my kids ok, "Get on the floor," is a volcano about to erupt, "Get down, get on the floor," be calm for the kids, when will it stop shaking, it is still shaking, this is for real, why did I hang up the phone with Tara, what do you do when there's no where to go?

Of course, all the circuits were busy so I couldn't get back on the phone with Tara. My kids were pretty good, although Tanner was talking a lot. Which, if you know Tanner, means that he was talking nonstop. Then, you begin to notice that things have moved, like a huge refrigerator, which moved a foot away from the wall. You walk into the bathroom and see all the soap and shampoo bottles in the middle of the tub knocked over. You see that next door your neighbors chest of drawers, which were stacked two high, had fallen over. You hear one of your student neighbors fell out of bed.

Then, as you are collecting yourself, an aftershock hits. Although lasting only a second, it's a reminder that it is all for real. You really were shaken to your core for several seconds just 7 minutes before, but those seven minutes seemed to have lasted 7 hours while your stomach is feeling queasy and it isn't because you need to eat. Probably after an hour of real time you then notice there are hairline cracks in the dry wall throughout the room.

No, we haven't seen any buildings down and we haven't been anywhere to see any road cracks or landslides (there were some!!). But, it still seems crazy that the entire "Earth move[d] under our feet." We are all okay, although now, even 9 hours later, I still have some anxiety. Just ten minutes ago an aftershock hit hard enough to be felt and your heart skips a beat. The below is nothing exciting... no collapsed ceiling, and it can't capture the feeling of the quake, but it is a small reminder of what happened at 7:07 a.m. this morning in Kona!

2006-10-13T12:17:00.000-05:00

Every Thursday night at the U of N we have a worship celebration, complete with teaching. Last night Paul and Susi Childers spoke about their ministry to be voices for the voiceless. Our hearts were touched by God's Spirit as they spoke of the horrors faced by women and children around the world.

Because of their work as missionaries they have learned of many travesties and injustices around the globe and God led them to produce a prayer booklet as well as other media to help raise the consciousness of the Church about these issues. The prayer booklet starts with a forward from Loren Cunningham, a part of which says:

"A few years ago, I was asked the question, “What will be the greatest global challenge as we enter the 21st Century?” You may think of war, terrorism, famine, AIDS and a number of other colossal needs, which all surely qualify. But among the most serious issues is gender injustice – the abuse and suppression of women. Why? Because it is the biggest, most far reaching, and most hidden.The Church needs to take a stand, the Church needs to raise its voice, the Church needs to pray and act, because God’s heart breaks over gender injustice.”

The Childers write further: The global abuse and suppression of women must stop. We must pray and act! The booklet is a tool that will enable you to begin to engage in helping solve this colossal challenge that the world faces in the 21st century. Our goal is to mobilize 100,000 people to pray for 5 minutes each day for 30 days for these issues. If successful we will have raised 28.5 years worth of prayer! In addition this book will enable you to hit the streets and become a voice for the voiceless.

I began praying this morning with Day 1 of the Booklet. It was on child prostitution.

Can you imagine being so poor and being unable to feed your family so that you consider selling your daughters into prostitution to raise money? Not only do you then have one less mouth to feed, but you also are given money to help with the remaining family members. There are many communities where such a choice is faced often.

To learn more about this incredible ministry, to order booklets, and to send donations to this please click here: http://www.photogenx.net/index.htm

2006-10-11T03:35:00.000-05:00

This is Jazz!
He was the Riley household pet for 1 day! I guess we didn't have enough bugs for him to eat-yeah!

Regan thinks she is a gecko catcher like her big brothers! She ran to get her step stool, positioned it just so and reached as high as she could to catch Jazz. It was not high enough. Jazz ran and hid in our closet and that is the last we have seen of him!

( Oh, by the way this is Tara blogging for the first time due to pressure from my female friends so they know I exist! This is way too impersonal for me! If you want to know how I am doing call me :) )

Here's a quick update on what I have been up to at the U of N.

Last week I talked to the librarian here on campus about ordering some DVDs that tell about Jesus and other educational themes that special needs kids might enjoy watching. I felt there was nothing of this nature in their great selection of materials. I did not anticipate her response. We went to the website and she ordered over $300 worth of DVD's!! Praise God that families with special needs kids will have these here to watch for years to come. This sweet librarian has played with all the Riley children as they frequent the only air conditioned place on campus nearly daily! :) Thank you to my friend Stephanie Jensen who gave me the idea and let me bring her video!

I did not anticipate using my professional expertise as an occupational therapist quite so much, but I see that there is a great need for that here on the island. So, I am stepping out of my comfort zone and doing the thing I enjoy the least-speaking in front of groups of people-because I think I can give them information that will be helpful in teaching other children, with or without special needs! I have three 45-minute inservices scheduled to speak to the U of N preschool staff and one 3-hour workshop open to the public!!! I am busy trying to make a flier, publicize, and plan what I will say!!!

One more (of many other) neat thing I am hoping to attend is the Iron Man Medical Conference! People from all over the world come to this event to attend the conference and watch or participate in the Iron Man triathlon. (Our entire family will volunteer at an aid station). I will attend to get my yearly required hours, but I am also hoping to meet many people and tell them about YWAM and the amazing work the U of N is doing to spread the gospel of Jesus around the world! Oh, and I am a little excited about the list of speakers and topics that will be covered!

2006-10-10T20:56:00.000-05:00

Ahhh, you are standing in line at the mess hall of the University of the Nations, gazing upon the delicacies offered daily for breakfast...oatmeal, bulk yogurt, toppings for the oatmeal and hard- and soft-boiled eggs. The joys of community living.

I thought the view of the yogurt being poured out was especially appetizing this morning at 6:30 a.m. If you stop and listen closely you can hear the plopping noises, taking you back to that time you had a stomach virus...

A strength of YWAM is community living. It is efficient and cost effective. Buying and preparing food for large numbers of people makes things more affordable, particularly in a place like Hawaii or Hong Kong. It also means that your palate cannot be picky. Monday through Friday the breakfasts here are always the same and look like what you see above.

There are other really wonderful aspects to community living. You may have just today, in your secluded home, raised your voice loudly at your children in anger. Given the size of your home and the separation from other homes, it goes unnoticed by the rest of the world. If, however, you can imagine living in a 600 square foot un-air conditioned "apartment" or "dorm room," with 100 people living in rooms beside, below and all around you, you quickly realize that bellowing at your family will go noticed because everyone's windows are open wide. It provides terrific accountability. In fact, as you walk by others' rooms, you can hear normal conversations in full.

Imagine as well people from 40 different countries, with just as many languages, from as many different denominations living in a forty-acre campus. It is amazing how God brings unity to this place. We truly experience "[h]ow good and pleasant it is when brothers [and sisters] live together in unity!" Psalm 133:1. And, we must constantly check our pride at our doorstep and seek His strength and grace.

So, although my palate sometimes goes unpleased, I rejoice in this place as God gives us grace to grow and become more like Jesus Christ.

2006-10-09T18:16:00.000-05:00

This is us with the Wicks family, Ben, Angie, Sam and Katie. The lovely beach you see is Hapuna. We went there with them back in early August, while we were praying over whether to come back to Kona or not. They also are the family that are letting us use their car during our stay here while they minister in Fiji. Please pray for them as they are seeing fruit to their ministry as you will see below!!!

The Wicks are, as I type this, in their third week of serving as missionaries to the island of Fiji. They and several others from their Discipleship Training School were called to serve for two months there. While I am here doing boring stuff like talking to attorneys and other administrative matters for the University, they are serving our Lord Jesus in Fiji. I just received this update from their team there.

Ni Sa Bula Vinaka from the CDTS Fiji outreach team!

We have just finished our second week of ministry here in Fiji. What follows is our first official update containing a general summary of what we have been up to and what God is doing in and through us on our outreach so far. The first week of our outreach was spent connecting with our contacts here, spending some time in orientation meetings with them, and beginning our outreach ministries.

Our main contacts here are Vini and Lomani Gaunavinaka (recently arrived from Kona), Tress Rokodovu (a YWAMer and local Fijian), and "Pastor Mike" (pastor of one of the local Assembly of God churches here and coined as the Loren Cunningham of Fiji).

Our ministry to this point has been focused in several different areas:

Lautoka Prison - We have been sending a small team of people each day with Pastor Mike to the men's prison here. They have basically been running a mini-DTS for a group of the inmates there. Last week, 18 of the 21 men either accepted Christ for the first time or recommited their lives to Him.

Lautoka Hospital - We have been sending a team of six people to the hospital about three days each week to talk to and pray for the patients there. On Friday, two of the men we prayed for recommited their lives to Christ. Today, we went into the children's ward to sing songs for the kids and pray for them and their parents. It was a very touching time.

After-School Program - On Tuesdays and Wednesdays, we run an after-school program at the home of Vini and Lomani for about 20 children between ages 8-12. We spend about 45 minutes helping them with their homework, another 45 minutes playing games down the street at a field, and another 30 minutes singing songs and learning Scripture verses.

Village Ministry - On Thursdays we send a large team to a nearby village which is situated next to the garbage dump. This is a time where we spend time with the adults and children...talking, playing, singing, etc.

Prostitute Ministry - On weekend nights, some of the women go out on the streets and witness to the prositutes and transvestites that hang out there.

Tomorrow we are sending a team of eight to one of the mountain villages for six days. Also, we are currently compiling more specific stories and testimonies and will send those in a later update.

Current prayer requests include: Health for several team members who are struggling physically, Protection and unity for the team travelling to the mountain village this week, Continued guidance from God on our ministry here.

God bless! Ben Wicks and the CDTS Fiji Team

2006-10-09T01:42:00.000-05:00

Since I just posted the gecko picture below, I thought I would add some of the ocean life we found. A friendly Islander who was snorkeling brought these critters to our kids. The urchins here are ones that aren't poisonous; however, there are some that if you step on them it can be quite painful. The big one Keaton is holding in the middle felt like a porcupine and could prick you if you weren't careful.

2006-10-09T01:20:00.000-05:00

Life in Kona, Hawaii, helps you understand the old Proverb that says lizards can even be found in King's palaces. Now, of course, we don't live in a King's palace, but my son Tanner noticed we had a friend living with us tonight. :)

We really thought the Christmas theme he brought to our room was rather nice. In case you didn't know it, geckos are a regular part of life here. They are God's gift to us to keep the bugs under some level of control, BUT even all the geckos don't keep up with all the ants and other critters that make life in our dorms here at the University of the Nations more interesting than our house in Arkansas.

2006-10-06T18:46:00.000-05:00

I must start carrying my camera so that I will have pictures to go with these stories. Today at lunch I met Jack. In fact, I ate lunch with Jack from Thailand and Paul from Canada. Jack is the only student here from Thailand. He is a part of the Compassion DTS. He will be studying Discipleship and Missions for the next three months and then traveling for two months to Africa to work with children afflicted by the AIDS epidemic.

Jack is from a village in Northwest Thailand. His entire family is Buddhist. When he was in college in Bangkok, he met some Christians from Atlanta, Georgia who were a part of Campus Outreach. They came to the University when he was a freshman, but he avoided them when he learned they were there to tell people about Jesus. When they returned the next year, he saw their joy and he thought he could at least practice his English. So, he got to know them.

In the course of the time of getting to know them, they asked him if he thought he needed Jesus. He realized that he did. With their leadership, he asked Christ into his life. After college, he would travel two hours to Bangkok to go to church because there were no churches in his community. His dad still doesn't know he is a Christian. He now is continuing his growth and education here in Kona, preparing to carry the gospel of Jesus Christ to Africa.

It is humbling to see a young man willing to forsake his family, his community and his country for the cause of Christ. He has given up much to follow Jesus, but to see his excitement and humility was inspiring. Pray for Jack as he continues to learn what it means to follow Jesus and for his ministry to the families he will be meeting in Africa. As I learn more about where all the Compassion DTS will be going I will write more.

2006-10-05T16:00:00.000-05:00

I found an interesting article recently at www.pastors.com. I'm curious about the thoughts of pastors who read it, so please comment if you can or email me. I'm including the first two paragraphs here and the link to the entire article below. It is from Rick Warren's ministry toolbox.

PASTORS MAY BE MORE VULNERABLE TO PORNOGRAPHY THAN OTHERS
by Richard Nevard

Christian ministry is a unique vocation. Ordinary men and women, who sense God's prompting, lay aside their own personal ambitions in order to serve others. Clergypersons are no different than the rest of the human race. They have the same passions, hopes, and dreams as everyone else. These men and women also have the same stirrings as others: they are sexual beings, moved by the same passions of life and influenced by the same negative forces.
In fact, a pastor's own position and typical temperament can make him more prone to sexual addictions. Environmental factors play a huge role in character development and susceptibility. Statistics show higher percentages of clergy come from dysfunctional families than not. (See Understanding Clergy Misconduct in Religious Systems by Candace Benvei.) Some enter ministry, freed from their own personal hell, wishing to help others get free as well. But once ordained, they discover that more healing was necessary and hell has caught up with them. Others enter ministry as a desperate attempt to overcome their own personal dysfunctions, hoping such a commitment will deliver them from the sin that has held them.

http://www.pastors.com/article.asp?ArtID=9868

2006-10-03T19:13:00.000-05:00

Our son, Tanner, is attending the Foundations school while we are here at the University of the Nations. This is a school set up for kids aged 3-18 who are attending because their parents are taking the Discipleship Training School. While we aren't in DTS, Tanner was allowed to participate. The school is somewhat of a kids' version of the DTS, designed to focus on the child's relationship with God and teaching academics as a part of that process. For example, one way they learn reading and writing is through studying God's word and journaling about what they are learning. They also actively participate in outreaches in the community (doing service projects at the local home for the retired, for example) and will write about those as well. We are very excited for him.

Two nights ago we had the parent-teacher meeting for the school. We were introduced to the school's leaders, Thor and Magrete Stensby, originally of Norway. Magrete shared her testimony and I knew I wanted to write about it here. I know I will forget aspects of it, but I hope you can catch a small glimpse of the miraculous story of their coming to the U of N.

She described their family as the "typical" Christian European family. They had no understanding of a relationship with God and went to church on occasion. But, she had had an illness that prevented her from being able to walk without crutches for twelve years and often ambulated in a wheelchair. She also generally couldn't travel because she had to be near a hospital.

One night she had a dream with the word and picture of Hawaii. Being from Norway, they really didn't know what or where Hawaii was. But, she had the dream again, and again, for an entire week. She finally said to Thor, I think we should go to Hawaii. As a result, they researched and discovered the University of the Nations and decided to come, even though everything about traveling and her situation made it seem ridiculous.

When they arrived, with their two children, they immediately thought of leaving. The people were, from their perspective at the time, crazy. They talked of a relationship with God, hearing from God, living a life for God, and so on. It was very odd and somewhat frightening to them, but they stuck it out.

When the leaders of their school asked them to pray for their individual theme for the quarter, she basically thought about it and decided (without much prayer because she had no expectation of God speaking to her personally) that "Step by step into 2000" sounded nice. Interestingly enough, her daughter, in Foundations school, also drew a picture of a woman standing in front of the sun with both arms raised to the sky and crutches at her feet on the ground.

She remembers well the day God told her she was going to walk again. And walk she did. Without praying for healing, without any realization that God was going to heal her, she heard that word from God and she not only walked that day, she ran 2 miles. Today, some 6 years later, she and Thor are active exercise enthusiasts who run and cycle long distances. God healed her physically and touched their lives in a way that has never changed. They were awakened spiritually and entered into a relationship with the real and living God.

Praise the LORD, O my soul; all my inmost being, praise his holy name. Praise the LORD, O my soul, and forget not all his benefits- who forgives all your sins and heals all your diseases, who redeems your life from the pit and crowns you with love and compassion, who satisfies your desires with good things so that your youth is renewed like the eagle's. Psalm 103:1-5

2006-09-30T16:41:00.000-05:00

This young lady is a student here at the University of the Nations from Mongolia. She is carrying her nation's flag during the opening night ceremony. We saw 33 young people carrying 33 different nations' flags representing the 33 nations from which the students hail. Additionally, there are staff members here from even more nations. Opening night to the fall quarter was an amazing night of praise and worship in song and dance, including many native Hawaiian numbers.

Please pray that all the people from all these many cultures will come together as one in Christ as we learn to live together on campus. Because the rooms are not air conditioned, we live with windows open at all times, thus all noises, conversations, etc. (including the jumping of our two year old) are very shared. Praise God for His amazing power to bring together His children for His purposes!!!!!

2006-09-29T21:29:00.000-05:00

GOD IS MOVING IN FIJI

You can read about some exciting happenings in the Island Nation of Fiji here: http://http://www.uofnkona.edu/index.cfm?fuseaction=control.main&sectionID=94

The above picture shows a "high chief" in Fiji with Mark Anderson and Loren Cunningham of YWAM and two pastors in Fiji. Mark is one of the YWAM leaders involved in another strategic partnership between missions organizations. I will write more about that later.

2006-09-29T01:54:00.000-05:00

MORE OF WHAT IS HAPPENING AT THE UNIVERSITY OF THE NATIONS

Check out this link: http://onestory.org/Partners. This is a strategic mission partnership between the IMB, YWAM, Wycliffe, Campus Crusade, and TransWorld Radio. David Hamilton, the U of N Provost, is the liaison for YWAM to One Story, and he is based here in Kona. Dr. Grant Lovejoy and Avery Willis, both with the IMB, are orality experts who are helping drive the partnership as well, and they have been to the U of N multiple times this year. You can read more about it at the attached pdf, which contains the quarterly magazine of the U of N: http://www.uofnkona.edu/Transformations/pdfs/Summer2006.pdf

2006-09-27T19:19:00.000-05:00

WHAT ALL IS HAPPENING AT THE UNIVERSITY OF THE NATIONS?

One example of an exciting to ministry tool is the continuing development of 4K. The map below, difficult to see because I've taken a shrunken sample for this post, is an example of what 4K will enable missionaries to do when they are determining their strategic focus.

The International Coordinator of 4K for Youth With a Mission, Dustin Barrington, defines it this way: “4k” is a global information system that uses databases and maps to visually represent where we are, and more importantly, where we are NOT... in our progress toward reaching the entire world with the Gospel. By helping the different parts of the Body of Christ to understand how they relate to one another 4k creates a foundation for global partnership, strategy development and mobilization.

How does "4k" work? “4k” is a tool that uses political boundaries, population and the availability of the gospel to divide the entire world into 4,379 “4k zones.” - Where the gospel is widely available, 4k zones have a limit of 9 million in population.- Where the gospel is partially available, 4k zones have a limit of 6 million in population.- Where the gospel is not available, 4k zones have a limit of 3 million in population. 4k zones use the recognized boundaries that the nations of the world have established for their own administrative levels (e.g. country, states, provinces, regions, etc). By using existing geopolitical boundaries, 4k is able to make huge amounts of ‘public access’ research and statistics easily accessible to Christians in a highly visual and interactive format. There are currently over 200 pieces of statistical and demographic data available for each 4k zone through a cutting edge web-based dynamic map generation tool developed by the 4k team.

“Go into ALL the world” 4k includes the entire world while gently focusing on where the gospel is needed most. 4k visually represents reality in a way that causes us to perceive things that have previously escaped our attention. 4k is a tool that helps us, as the Body of Christ, to work together to fulfill the ‘Great Commission.’ See..See the world in a new way...the way it really is...Pray...Pray therefore to the Lord of the Harvest... to send laborers into His harvest fields...Hear...Hear from God about how to respond... “ here am I, send me…”GO!“ Go into all the world…” “Go and make disciples…” 4kA visual tool… communicating God’s vision… to a visual generation…

For more about 4K go to http://www.ywam4k.org and http://beta.ywam4k.org. The work in progress at the beta site is still "in progress." But it will give you an idea of the work being done and what is to come. Check it out and let me know what you think!

2006-09-24T11:45:00.000-05:00

Meet Marie Noelle Kok, a beautiful and godly woman from Cameroon, who is expecting her first baby in October. We met Marie Noelle and Paul, her husband from Canada, when we were first at the University of the Nations in July. Tara attended her baby shower the other evening.

She had this sad revelation at the shower. Never before, at any baby shower she has attended, have the women prayed together for the expectant mother and baby. NOT EVEN ONCE! Please understand that Tara has had three children of her own, each of which occasioned multiple showers. Then, she has attended dozens of others. Moreover, it is likely that almost, if not all, of those showers were thrown for "Christian" moms by "Christian" women.

Has this been your experience? I doubt that it is unique to the places we have lived in Arkansas. Why would this be true? Why wouldn't the focus of a baby shower be asking God's blessing upon the new life and the parents of that child? Why do we let the trappings of our culture, of gifts and cake and "fellowship," distract us from our relationship with Christ? Besides the fact we are commanded to pray without ceasing, what other occasions would this be true of? What would make a "Christian" gathering at a baby shower any different than any other party thrown for someone?

For the men reading this post, ask your wives and others who do attend such matters. Let me know what you find out. Ladies, do you think that Tara's experience is unusual? And, for everyone reading this, let's do all we can to change this. Don't let another opportunity like a Christmas party or a baby shower go by without bringing the focus of the gathering to the place it should be... a focus upon God and His blessing.

2006-09-23T03:31:00.000-05:00

COUNTING JUST A FEW BLESSINGS

When upon life’s billows you are tempest tossed,

When you are discouraged, thinking all is lost,

Count your many blessings, name them one by one,

And it will surprise you what the Lord hath done.\

Count your blessings, name them one by one,

Count your blessings, see what God hath done!

Count your blessings, name them one by one,

And it will surprise you what the Lord hath done.

Are you ever burdened with a load of care?

Does the cross seem heavy you are called to bear?

Count your many blessings, every doubt will fly,

And you will keep singing as the days go by.

When you look at others with their lands and gold,

Think that Christ has promised you His wealth untold;

Count your many blessings. Wealth can never buy

Your reward in heaven, nor your home on high.

So, amid the conflict whether great or small,

Do not be disheartened, God is over all;

Count your many blessings, angels will attend,

Help and comfort give you to your journey’s end.

We have been praying for a car for use while we are here at the University of the Nations. We had the use of someone else's car for our first week here and had to return it this evening. So, after doing much asking around, trying to find a way to borrow someone else's car, rent a car, or buy a "junker," we were prepared to try to buy one today as nothing else had panned out. We hoped that we could buy something that wouldn't have mechanical issues and that we could ultimately resell at the end of our stay here in December.

The power of prayer and the medium of blogging is amazing. A young lady in Canada had seen both our blog and the blog of Ben and Angie Wicks, from Seattle, Washington (http://www.wicksadventure.blogspot.com/). Ben and Angie have been here at the U of N since June, in the Crossroads DTS. We met them when we were here in July and have communicated with them ever since. They purchased a car when they arrived and were going to try to resell it now that they are leaving for Fiji on a two-month mission outreach with their two young children, Sam (6) and Katie (4). Recently, she emailed Ben and Angie that we needed a car, because she knew that they were trying to sell theirs. She had no idea that we already knew each other and that God was already moving in our hearts toward sharing the car! But her email also reminded the Wicks to see if we might be able to help them with the car.

Today, just as I was about to go to a used car dealer to buy a car, Ben called me and asked whether Tara and I could use the car in exchange for being the contact person for people who wanted to buy the car. That seemed like a good answer to prayer, because it would provide us a car free of charge for at least a little while until something more permanent could come along. It is a nice 2002 White PT Cruiser. He told me the details of what he was asking and hoping to get for it, but said that he felt like it would be hard to resell it here because of the limited number of people on the island (there are only about 150,000 people on the entire Big Island of Hawaii).

As soon as we got off the phone, God spoke to me directly and gave me an idea, telling me to call Ben right back. So, I did. I told Ben that I wasn't sure if this would be a good idea to him, but that I thought it would be perfect for us if we simply used his car for all three months and then paid to have the car shipped to Seattle, where the Wicks are from, so that they could have the car for sale in the Seattle market. He said he liked the idea, but that he wanted to think and pray about it.

After prayerful consideration, the deal was struck. God provided the Rileys a much nicer car than they felt they could afford (and it even has air conditioning!!) at a price that will be less than anything else than they could have done short of having a car gifted to them. Add to that the fact that yesterday I received a phone call from one of our friends telling me he wanted to send us a check that will be the amount of shipping for the vehicle!!!

Ben gave me the keys to the car at 5 p.m., as they were leaving for Fiji. I gave Dawn Gauslin the keys to her car just an hour later. Tonight we rejoiced in this blessing by taking all five of us on a drive around Kona and finishing with a piece of mud pie right by the ocean.

In addition to the car, Tara today was given sheets, pillows, floor rugs, a fan, books, decorations, and a multitude of other nice gifts by the Wicks and Nick and Jen Greener, another young couple leaving today for Fiji with their two children. We were truly overwhelmed with many blessings of things we really weren't prepared to buy but that will be very useful to our family.

Please pray for the Greeners and the Wicks as they travel to Fiji over the next 24 hours. Please pray that their families will not eat or drink anything that will be harmful to their bodies over the next 2 months and that God will protect them from all disease. Pray that they will bear joyfully the gospel of Christ every where they go, demonstrating God's love to the people of Fiji. Pray also that the Greeners and the Wicks will know where the Lord is leading them after their outreach to Fiji. The Wicks feel led to work with college students, but they have no idea what that might mean. The Greeners desire to go overseas to staff a YWAM base, but they don't know where God is leading them. There are probably 20-25 others with them; pray for the entire team. And praise God for His faithfulness to us. He is truly AMAZING!

2006-09-20T15:17:00.000-05:00

GOD USES "LIBERALS" LIKE WADE BURLESON, TOO

Some of you may be reading my blog for the first time. Please allow me this first paragraph to catch you up to speed on our family's lives. We recently left our careers as an attorney and an occupational therapist to enter the mission field with YWAM (Youth With a Mission) http://www.ywam.org/. As a result, we are now in Kona, Hawaii, at the University of the Nations, http://www.uofnkona.edu/, serving as operational support for the University campus through the end of this year. If you read more of my posts below you will see some of the amazing things God has done in our lives as He has taken us on this journey. This is actually our second time to the U of N, as we first came to learn about YWAM during the month of July 2006.

Also, you can go to our website, at http://www.fjministries.com/, and see our mission, newsletters (http://www.fjministries.com/component/option,com_docman/Itemid,36/task,cat_view/gid,18/) and other information about us. This post, however, is dedicated to explaining who was one of the key people God used to help us find God's way for our lives. That person was none other than Wade Burleson, the pastor of Emmanuel Baptist Church in Enid, Oklahoma. Although some may criticize Wade or wonder about his commitment to missions and evangelism, I can attest to the mighty ways in which God uses men like Wade based on my personal experience. Not only have I seen him witness to a waiter in a restaurant at the drop of a hat, I also know he is committed to helping young men and women like my wife and me succeed as we transition into the mission field.

Along my journey over the past 6-9 months I have twice asked Wade for specific counsel. He has become somewhat of a mentor to me after first meeting him while I was serving on a pastor search team. He struck me as being a man of God's word, of strong conviction and leadership skills, and of great and passionate grace. I've been blessed to visit his church and his home, as well as to spend many hours listening to his sermons via the intranet.

The first time I sought his counsel was simply an email message in passing. I knew he was very busy with the Southern Baptist Convention approaching and all that was being said in the blog world. I hated to bother him. So, several months ago I sent him an email that said little more than, if you were going to consider going into the mission field, what organizations would you recommend? His brief email response named three organizations, the first of which was YWAM. It struck an odd but good chord within me as I had known a couple of families who had ventured out with YWAM and who recommended it highly. At that point, I didn't even know if I was really being called to missions, seminary, or just a different job than the one I was working as an attorney.

Fast forward to August 4, 2006, the last Friday I was set to be in Hawaii this summer, and the Friday upon which I was called by Loren Cunningham, the Founder of YWAM, at 6:45 a.m. to consider some special projects for him. We (Tara and me) were overwhelmed by the request and had already planned to do something completely different. We simply wanted to return to NW Arkansas, take 3 months to build support, and then go to a discipleship training school within YWAM to learn how to become missionaries. We had no grandiose plans or desire to take on any new responsibilities. We were already overwhelmed with the changes we were making and did not believe we had the strength to do anything else. In essence, we said "no." But, at Loren's request, we committed to consider the request in prayer and specifically knew that if God truly wanted us to take on this new request that we would need a very clear answer from Him.

On that Friday, I emailed a dozen or so men who are close friends and counselors. Wade was one of those men. My family then took the weekend to see the Big Island of Hawaii for the first time by renting a car for the weekend (we had been on foot at the YWAM base prior to that time). During that weekend of fun and relaxation we didn't talk much about it, but we prayed. I had also requested in my email that my counselors would pray and seek God's word for us.

On Monday, August 7th, I then began calling some of those who were praying for us. I called Wade right in the middle of a marriage counseling session, so he then called me back later. Our discussion was incredible. He didn't overspiritualize things and ask me questions like "have you prayed," or "what verses of scripture have you looked at." Instead, he immediately went to the bottom line and asked how would God provide financially for such a venture (because all positions in YWAM are support based only and not paid any compensation), and what my wife, Tara, felt.

Both of those practical concerns basically advised against making such a move from our plans. I was, frankly, relieved, because at that point was much more comfortable with our plan. We also discussed other aspects of the "job" such as "fit" with my strengths, etc. In sum, I was thinking that I had been given great advice and that such advice fit well with what I was already thinking, which was to continue on with our plan and not take on this new opportunity Loren Cunningham had presented us. (So, of course, it sounded like great advice (smile)). Moreover, Wade noted that God was interested in my heart, and that unless I heard a clear word from God to take a particular path, so long as my heart was in the right place, the place of obeying and following Him no matter the call, then I couldn't make a "wrong" choice.

There is always a "but." So.... BUT, then we prayed together. After we prayed, Wade asked me a question that I thought was odd. I assumed he must have gone back to discussing the financial realities of returning to Hawaii, if I were to undertake Loren's opportunity. He asked what it had cost my family of 5 to get to Hawaii. I was thinking to myself, I'm not sure it really matters now, because I'm pretty much not thinking at all of returning. But, I told him that our tickets were almost $800 per person.

He then brought me to a burst of uncontrollable tears with this statement: "Bryan, I really don't think it matters at all which choice you make, and I won't be concerned at all about either choice, but, if you do decide to return to Hawaii to work with Loren, know that I've got your family's plane tickets."

You see, at this point, we had not asked anyone for a dime. I wasn't asking people for money. I simply wanted to get back home, be able to explain what our mission and plans were, and then start raising support. We had undertaken all the expenses for making this transition and exploratory venture in July, and we really hadn't fully committed yet in a way that seemed fair to ask people for support. Meanwhile, I'm praying that God would give us a clear sign that He was calling us. And, here I am, talking to Wade Burleson, a man whom I knew through a pastor search team process, but not in any way where we had been in ministry together, and suddenly am being offered a gift of several thousand dollars. The fear that overtook my comfort was overwhelming to the point of a multitude of tears running down my face. I felt as though God must have spoken audibly through Wade at that moment.

Then the fear of telling my wife hit me. You see, earlier that day she had told me that this still wasn't even on her radar screen and I had agreed. So, I simply cried. Poor Wade, who was still on the other end of the phone, as I tried to blubber my way to good bye.

I'll never forget walking in to tell Tara and her looking at me and saying: "What is wrong with you?" It makes me laugh even now, because it wasn't with that concerned look on her face she said it. She knew I had been talking to some of the people I had emailed, so to the extent she was concerned it was more about whether I was actually considering taking Loren up on his offer, not about any reason I might be crying.

Then, one by one, nearly all of the other men I called felt that God was moving us toward returning to Hawaii. And, through the nudges of the Holy Spirit (and I think for the first time in our marriage without me trying to persuade), Tara saw that it was a part of the plan for us, too. And, so, we returned just 6 days ago to the University of the Nations and have been so blessed throughout this journey of faith and obedience.

Thank you to all of the men who prayed for and counseled me throughout this process. You blessed my family tremendously. Thank you to Alan Cross, Kevin McCollum, Kevin Bussey, Mike Roberts, Robby Bader, Rob Husong, David Roth, David Price, Bill Barley, Bryan McKinney, James Cooper, John Ray, David Spruell, Wade Burleson, Paul Burleson, Kevin Sanders, HD McCarty, Jim Hightower, Jim Nizza, Andy Huddleston, Steve Pulliam, and Jody Farrell. Okay, that was more than a dozen, but praise the Lord there is success with many advisers! (Proverbs 15:22).

2006-09-20T02:29:00.000-05:00

This post's picture is taken at the entry way to the University of the Nations in Kona, Hawaii. The U of N is absolutely an amazing place. Please allow me to explain.

First, there are hundreds of people here year round all seeking to know God better and to learn how to make Him known more. Every quarter, like what is happening this week, hundreds leave campus to go on outreaches and hundreds of new students show up to prepare for other outreaches. I know people who are leaving this week to go to Fiji, the Solomon Islands (where there is no electricity or running water), Guatemala, France, Japan, and I am sure there are other locations of which I am unaware.

Because some are leaving this week, we were blessed to move on campus at the same time. We did not know what all that would entail. Our room is beautiful. It is designed for air flow from the ocean and the mountains behind us and looks something like you might see on the side of a Colorado mountain. We have a small loft and plenty of space for the five of us. It is probably 600 or more square feet. What we didn't know is that all that is provided in the rooms are beds and chest of drawers. But, here's what happens when Christians live Christ-like and in community. Today a guy shows up in a truck with a refrigerator and a sofa in the back of his truck. What does he charge for supplying it, bringing it, and helping me move it into our place? Nothing. Just a thank you and a smile. He's been here before. He told us that his home and his truck were gifts from God and he simply wants to pass all he can on to others.

In addition, there is this incredible little place on campus called the "Boutique." It's not a hair salon or anything like that. Instead, it is a place where people in the community of the University of the Nations leave anything they no longer need behind. If there is something in there you need, you can simply take it, for FREE. So, we ventured in today and found towels, dishes, linens, shoes, uniforms for Keaton and Regan (at their preschool they wear uniforms), insect repellant, and so on and so on. I seem to recall that the early churches did similar things. And, please, understand that this isn't junk. There are perfectly good computer printers, coffee makers, clothing, etc. in the boutique. People simply leave anything behind they can't take with them on outreaches or back to the mainland or they leave such things behind simply as a gift for someone in more need than they are.

The U of N truly is a remarkable place. Not only are thousands of men, women, and children being trained to share the gospel of Christ, they are also living it out here, sharing with those in need all that they are and have. I'm looking out on the campus from our new home. All is quiet. It's about 9:45 p.m. Hawaiian time. My kids have finally knocked off and all I hear are the sounds of our box fans increasing our air flow for comfort. We have a beautiful "new" used refrigerator (seriously, the man who gave it to us completely cleaned it up and even repainted it--it looks new) in which we can put milk and ice cream and other "necessities" (smile). We do have some annoying lights right outside our bedside windows, but otherwise we are incredibly blessed.

We are still praying for a vehicle and now hope to obtain a few rugs, a few more towels and sheets, and other odds and ends to make our new home a little more "homey." Thank you for all of your prayers and love from afar. Know that in this neck of the woods people are genuinely trying to follow the example of Christ, sharing all that they are and have with other brothers and sisters in Christ. We have a lot to learn...

2006-09-16T22:26:00.000-05:00

Wow. We made it. At this point it feels like barely. We are tired. We arrived at our apartment in Kona at about 6:00 p.m. Hawaiian time, which would be 11:00 p.m. in Arkansas (CST). We got up about 4:00 a.m. CST and left our house in Arkansas at 5:00 a.m. to begin the trek across the U.S. and halfway across the Pacific Ocean with our three children, a stroller, two car seats, 9 carryons and 10 checked bags.

Praise God for the hospitality of Dawn Gauslin here in Kona. She greeted us with a big smile, hugs, and a 15-passenger van. We loaded all of the above into that and drove the 7 miles to the place we will be staying for the first 10 days here. She helped us unload everything and had our apartment ready with food, drink, flowers, candy and a card.

She then took me to go get her car and left us with the keys. We have a car to use for the first few days to help us find something more permanent.

God was also very hospitable to us because after we had gotten all settled in a beautiful, refreshing rain began falling that fell throughout the night. It was much more hospitable than the greeting we received from our downstairs neighbor. She didn't come to ask us how we were or anything about being new... she just let us know we were being too noisy. :) oops. What was scary about that was that we were so tired I didn't think we had any children bouncing off the walls, but perhaps we did.

The apartment is clean and bright. It is a little bigger than our last place but still mostly a studio feel. It has the big beautiful sliding shades to separate off a single bedroom from the pull out couch. It isn't air conditioned but the night breeze keeps things fairly temperate. The place is about 1/3 of a mile from campus, down the hill.

Friday we met with Loren to learn a little bit more about our next three months. I met one of the people I will be working with with regard to some of the accounting aspects of operations. it sounds like it is the hope that we can have a team of people who will focus on various aspects of operations, including finance, policy, strategy, etc.

After that meeting we visited the preschool where Keaton and Regan will attend. We are excited as Loren's daughter, Karen, will be Regan's teacher. The preschool is topnotch and is rated the highest on the island. This is an area of prayer as there are costs associated with their attendance and we could use some support in this area of our budget. We are also hopeful that some of Tara's work with the school will help as well. Tara got a little teary eyed anticipating their move to SCHOOL as neither Keaton nor Regan have ever attended school or even been hardly to mother's day out! She is excited for them, though, and looks forward to working with me and others on campus to support the exciting ministry of the University.

Today we spent time on a beach. A much needed respite. Look up Hapuna. It is one of the world's prettiest beaches. It is 30 minutes north of where we are.

We can't connect to the internet at our apartment, but we can here on campus. I am in the campus library taking a little break before dinner to write this. I feel very out of touch. I did see in an email from Tara's parents that the Hogs beat Vandy. I'd forgotten about the game altogether. Amazing. Not that the Hogs won, but that I'd forget about football. :)

We will move on campus in about a week. Please keep praying for us. We are glad to be here because we know God brought us, but we are beaten up. He's blessed us with many little things even since being here, but we are reminded often how much we must desperately cling to Him.

We love you. Please email us with your prayer requests, happenings, news, and needs. Or call. We definitely need your prayer support and the support of hearing from you. Thank you so much!

2006-09-13T22:38:00.000-05:00

This is what it feels like right now. We are tired, beaten, broken, exhausted, BUT we have hope and can fold our hands in prayer because we know the One who will sustain us and who has called us. He gives us everything we need for life and godliness. He is our refuge; He is our strength. He is our help in times of trouble. We aren't, but He is. We cannot, but He can.

So as we continue packing (it's now 10:42 p.m.) to prepare for our 7:00 a.m. flight tomorrow morning (which will involve 15 hours in planes and airports to get to Kona), and as we try to get our minds wrapped around what we need for a three month jaunt, we ask that you, as you feel the same way, fold your hands in prayer. We aren't the only ones here, reading this, who feel broken and beaten, run over by the proverbial Mack truck. And, being able to acknowledge that we are weak and turn to the One who can pick us back up and give us hope and renew our strength, will enable us to soar on wings like eagles, run and not grow weary, walk and not be faint. Praise our heavenly Father together with us! And, as you experience His healing power, please pray that we will continue to fold our hands in prayer and praise to Him throughout our journey. We are completely unable to do this, but He graciously plans to use us to assist hundreds, perhaps thousands, in their desire to obey the Great Commission as we work together at the University of the Nations (http://www.uofnkona.edu), a YWAM (http://www.ywam.org) campus.

We sure would love to have many join us! "Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of compassion and the God of all comfort, who comforts us in all our troubles, so that we can comfort those in any trouble with the comfort we ourselves have received from God. For just as the sufferings of Christ flow over into our lives, so also through Christ our comfort overflows. If we are distressed, it is for your comfort and salvation; if we are comforted, it is for your comfort, which produces in you patient endurance of the same sufferings we suffer. And our hope for you is firm, because we know that just as you share in our sufferings, so also you share in our comfort." 2 Corinthians 1:3-7.

2006-09-11T22:35:00.000-05:00

Today was one of those days where all Tara and I could do was cling to God's promises like the one found in James 1:2-5: "Consider it pure joy, my brothers, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance. Perseverance must finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything. If any of you lacks wisdom, he should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to him."

I am so thankful that God is in control. I am so grateful that He has the plans. I can stop and say thanks even though the enemy is using so many things to try to make me believe that God is powerless to save me. On days like this I fully realize that if I were to live based on what makes sense to me, I am not sure I'd be alive. It is in this humbling realization that God shows me that in spite of all the fiery darts of the enemy, an enemy who is a roaring lion seeking to devour us, I can delight in Him, take refuge in Him, and truly taste and see that the Lord is good. I can remember His grace and that in spite of my human heart know that He who began a good work in me will see it through to completion.

For any who might be reading this, what practical things do you do or steps do you take when you are in a bleak moment? When it seems like God is far away or you aren't sure you can hear His voice? How does He comfort you and bring you back to "pure joy"?

As you think about your answer, take to heart these verses: "Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of compassion and the God of all comfort, who comforts us in all our troubles, so that we can comfort those in any trouble with the comfort we ourselves have received from God. For just as the sufferings of Christ flow over into our lives, so also through Christ our comfort overflows. If we are distressed, it is for your comfort and salvation; if we are comforted, it is for your comfort, which produces in you patient endurance of the same sufferings we suffer." 2 Corinthians 1:3-6

2006-09-08T22:48:00.000-05:00

Just a quick update to say that we are being blessed daily with additional funds for our ministry. Thank you, God! This verse spoke volumes to me this morning from Psalm 68:19-20. "Praise be to the Lord, to God our Savior, who daily bears our burdens. Our God is a God who saves; from the Sovereign Lord comes escape from death."

Oh, and for all who struggle in their calling, remember these words from Isaiah 48:17. "This is what the LORD says-- your redeemer, the Holy One of Israel: I am the LORD your God, who teaches you what is best for you, who directs you in the way you should go." These are words of encouragement to simply rest in Him and His purpose for you. Trust Him and follow in faith.

2006-09-06T09:41:00.000-05:00

Get this... The above picture is not us in hawaii. It was taken in January of 2006, well before we heeded God's call to the mission field. It hails from the days when I really didn't live in the reality of the fact I needed God desperately; instead, this is from a cruise we all took, with my wife's parents and sister's family, in honor of their 50th Wedding Anniversary. This is from the days when I could just write a check or use a credit card and pay for such things and not ask God about it.

Now, I'm in a different place. We can't just write a check. We need your prayers. We need your emotional support. We need your financial support. We need Him. We are leaving Arkansas in 8 days. Here are our prayer needs: (1) We don't have a place to live yet in Hawaii. We arrive by jet on September 14th, but we aren't sure of where we will lay our five heads that first evening; (2) We don't have a vehicle to get us from place to place there; (3) At this time, in about week 3 of support raising, we are at about 33% of needed funds; (4) That we would continue to trust God and not get anxious in spite of numers 1-3 above.

To all my blogging friends, please pray earnestly!!!! Please consider whether you can support us. Please tell others about our journey. If you dont' know much about YWAM, please know it is the largest interdenominational missions organization in the world and the University of the Nations, where I will be providing leadership, turns about 1500 or more missionaries every year to places all over the globe! If you have questions about all the things God has been doing, please let me know and I'd love to tell you more. Also, just look back at some of the things I've written in the past month or so. And, feel free to visit http://www.fjministries.com, our family's ministry website. Pray that we rest in His arms and not in our strength!! Thank you!!! Grace and Peace to You!!!

2006-09-04T08:23:00.000-05:00

The Life of Riley

Our first newsletter, aptly entitled "The Life of Riley" can be found in Adobe here: http://www.fjministries.com/index.php?option=com_docman&task=cat_view&gid=18&Itemid=36

Please give it a looksee. We are so grateful that He will provide all our needs. It is strange to step out without having a salary for the first time in my life, not knowing where the money will come from, but it is good to know that it is in His hands.

"My son, pay attention to what I say; listen closely to my words. Do not let them out of your sight, keep them within your heart; for they are life to those who find them and health to a man's whole body." Proverbs 4:20-22.

2006-09-03T17:56:00.000-05:00

MANNA FROM HEAVEN

It's 6:00 on Sunday evening and we have a free night...the first one in a while. I'm cooking sausage and pancakes on my famous griddle while typing this story. and, Ok, I will confess, I have been reading Blue Like Jazz. If you haven't read it, do.

So, last Friday I had three appointments lined up, none of them support raising, and then I had a possible lunch set up, again, not a support raising meeting. The first, a meeting with an insurance agent, was set up for 7:30 a.m. I arrived bright and early at his office, but he wasn't there. He had forgotten. We finally were able to get together at 8. Not a big deal, really, but as a result the other meetings I had scheduled at 9 and 10 all had to be pushed back 30 minutes.

About 10, while still at my 9:00 meeting, the 10 o'clock called to see if we should reschedule altogether. I told him that we could still meet at 10:30 if that would be okay. He was fine with that but wanted to change our location. So, we did.

Meanwhile, while I was still wrapping up the original 9:00 meeting, my 10 o'clock was sitting outside a coffee bar sipping a latte of some sort. A fellow church member sees his car, on his way home from work, and stops to chat.

I finally make it there about 10:30 and see that the guy I was meeting is there talking to this person I don't know (yet). In addition, understand that my 10 o'clock meeting is with a guy I haven't seen in 25 years and who also is in full-time ministry/missions. He raises support for his ministry, too.

As I walk up, this other "mystery man" introduces himself ("Mike") and then takes a seat at a nearby table to allow Bill, who is now William, and I to talk. And talk we do. Bill, now William, is one of those guys who just has an almost European flair to him, even though he has been in Arkansas (plus a few countries) for most of his life. If I remember correctly he actually is related to none other than Ken Kesey, the author of One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest, and also is an accomplished writer himself.

While Euro Bill and I talk, the Holy Spirit is working on the silent Mike. He is a young man, trying to build a business, who has had some difficult times. He drove up in a well loved, dented up vehicle.

Have you ever seen someone who is struggling with doing what he knows in his heart God has spoken to him to do? I mean, just this morning, I was struggling with the fact that i knew God was telling me to go down and pray at the altar during the offering time. I kept thinking, "oh, people will think I am seeking attention," and "I can just bow in my heart right here; it's just a personal thing." But, thankfully, the next words of the song were something about on bended knee, so I managed to push my reluctant body and heart up to the altar to pray.

Mike was battling that same battle. He was fidgety and nervous as he approached us and shared the following. I don't know what all had gone through his head while Bill and I talked for the 20 or so minutes he had been sitting nearby, thumbing through a phone book. Mike shared, "God knows I really struggle with trusting him and especially with money, but I just know I have to give you some." He looked almost like my 5 year old when he has to go potty. :) Bill immediately handed him my newsletter that I had just shown Bill and said, "here's your guy."

The next thing I know Mike is running off to an ATM and bringing me back $80. Why did this happen? How does God work? I don't know, but I am amazed by it. My whole day gets moved back 30 minutes and the location of my final appointment changes at the last minute. As a result, random $80 guy, Mike, shows up just to bless my family with $80. God knew just what both Mike and I needed. I needed manna and Mike needed to obey. And I am so thankful to the Father that his two children, Mike and me, decided to obey on that day.

Now, may I be faithful with what he has entrusted to me.

Have a happy Labor Day.

2006-08-22T15:21:00.000-05:00

I can imagine that some who might see the above picture think, "Boy, I'd sure like to be called to that ministry." :) When I see it I see joy--not because of the surroundings, but because God showed each of us we were right where God wanted us to be. It was as though we could feel as David did when he composed Psalm 27:4.

We often wonder how we can know God's will. There are many ways in which He reveals Himself. Sometimes He reveals Himself after we take a step of faith and affirms that step. Here are at least 20 things that happened to us within the first couple of weeks after deciding to quit my job and to head to the University of the Nations in Kona, Hawaii for the month of July. If there are typos it is because I'm scared to take the time to reread because blogger might time out (it happened once before and i lost this entire post).

1. Our first and last Sunday still in Arkansas after we had announced to our parents our plans, I was leading music for the contemporary services at church as I have been doing every other week for the past year. There is a 9:40 and an 11:00 service back to back. Right before we began the 11:00 I looked out at the gym floor where the congregation sits and see my parents (Bill and Caral Riley) walking in. They aren't regular church goers. It was just such a blessing to see them join with us in worship.

2. Shortly after we arrived for our classes at the University of the Nations I shared our story with one of the teachers, Andy Huddleston. As I told him about quitting my job we both learned for the first time that the very day upon which I quit he and other leaders at the U of N had worshipped together for three hours praying that God would send professional corporate workers to the U of N for the harvest. This was very significant for later developments on our trip.

3. Our family has never been adept at family devotions. But, in Hawaii God blessed our family with the desire to do them. We were amazed at hour our children asked us every day when we could do our devotion together.

4. Please go here, http://charisshalom.blogspot.com/2006_07_01_charisshalom_archive.html, to the July 16th entry, "How a Hog Call Led to a Divine Appointment." This amazing story of how God answered by wife's prayer at church on our second Sunday in Hawaii will bless you. Long story short: She prayed that we would meet someone new who would be a lasting relationship. Thank you David and Wendy Price for being obedient to God to the point of going to church on your Hawaiian vacation!!!

5. My wife and kids and I all went to a nearby beach called Queen's Bath about one week into our trip. Of all the dozens of beaches and thousands of people who may be on them, we began talking to this other mom. We eventually discover that she is Judy Cunningham, the daughter-in-law of Loren Cunningham, the founder of YWAM. This divine meeting was part of what led of the start of a relationship with Loren and Darlene Cunningham.

6. Alan Cross, fellow blogger (http://www.downshoredrift.com/downshoredrift/) and pastor. He emailed me one day to let me know that God had moved him to tears to pray for me and my family and offered his support. We had never met in person. We met solely through blogging. We have continued to grow in our relationship and hope to meet in person some day soon.

7. One of my best friends, Mike Roberts, thought I had lost my mind when I told him our plans. Understand this is a person who has been on three mission trips to Japan and who helps his church by planning mission trips for others. Nevertheless, he didn't understand our "drastic" decision. As a result, he began praying earnestly for us as soon as I told him. That night he was so troubled that he could barely sleep. God told him to find a book he had written by Steve Shadrach. He finally got out of bed in the middle of the night to find the book. As he read the foreword he realized that what was written there was identical to what I told him earlier that day about our decision. With that realization God gave him peace about our plans. Then, when he shared that experience with me, well, as you might imagine, God gave me peace, too.

8. Before we had even made our decision I had tried to reach good friends of ours, John and Jane Ray, who work with YWAM because I wanted to find out more. So, I had left them a message at their home. When they didn't return my call in the first couple of days, I became a little discouraged. I tried again, but to no avail. About a week later I was shopping in a grocery store and ran into Keith Lee, a friend I hadn't seen in about year (miraculous in and of itself that two husbands ran into each other in a grocery store--to his credit he even had one of his kids with him if I remember correctly!). We began catching up and I told him about my considering YWAM. He immediately asked if I had talked to John Ray. Well, I didn't even know he knew John, but I told him what I had done. He said, "Oh, they're in Hawaii; let me give you their cell number." As soon as I left the grocery I was on the line with John and within a few days we had tickets to Hawaii.

9. I'll stick with the Rays for a moment. When we arrived they basically hosted us. They picked us up at the Kona International Airport (which just sits off the ocean in the middle of lava fields with open air cabanas for terminals). They drove us, our three kids, and all our luggage for a month's stay to our small studio apartment (about 500 square feet). They had it all decked out for us. Food in the fridge, sheets, towels, etc. And, it had a window a/c unit blowing cool air to greet us as we unloaded heavy bags. Once we pulled the kids off of the walls and ceiling and got us all in bed, we fell asleep.

I, unfortunately, woke up after about one hour due to the jet lag. And, I was freezing. I couldn't turn on any lights since we were all in one room, so I stumbled to the wall where the a/c was and tried to turn the air warmer. Instead, I hit the wrong knob and turned it off. The sudden silence of turning off the fan scared me because I feared waking my kids. So, I quickly turned it back on, all the while hearing my dad's voice saying "don't ever turn on an a/c right after turning it off because you might blow the compressor!!!!"

Sure enough, the knob went to on, but the machine was dead. I turned it back to off and went back to bed, concerned. The next morning i immediately checked it, hoping that it had just been a fluke or that it had been frozen up. Dead. My mind was cluttered with money concerns and the concern of telling Tara, my wife. I told her and told her I would find the breaker box later. We needed to leave.

That evening, when we returned, I checked again. Dead. No a/c. No money to buy new a/c. Not my property. Ugh. I found the breaker box. Flicked the switch. Turned on the a/c. Nothing. Dead. Ugh. What, probably 200 bucks?? My mind flooded with thoughts yet again.

Then, I heard God saying to me, "Pray with your family for the a/c." Satan said, "what if it doesn't do anything? How will that challenge your kids' faith?" And I thought, "man, if i were in Arkansas with my job I'd just go to Sam's and buy a new one."

I told Tara what God had said and we prayed out loud, holding hands for the a/c. I said "amen." I walked to few steps to the a/c (everything in 500 square feet is a few steps), turned it on, and the fan blew out precious faith-filled cool air!!!!

10. When I knew I had to quit my job is when God told me I was like Jonah. He gave me that vision. I had heard his call about 5 years ago away from being a lawyer but decided to board a boat for Spain instead (in the form of staying on my legal boat). He told me, like Jonah, I better get off that boat. The first big group class I went to at the U of N, the teacher had us look closely at one particular book of the bible to practice inductive bible study. That book? Jonah.

11. Another one of the first people I met in Kona was Robert Evans. It took us about 2 minutes to realize that we had much in common with regard to our academic backgrounds. He had made a similar change of careers about ten+ years before and he was a great encouragement to me.

12. The morning after we got our plane tickets to Hawaii I went for a jog to the tunes of Chris Tomlin. As I turned to run this steep hill near our house (on North Street between College and Mission for you Fayetteville folk), God totally laid Proverbs 3:5-6 on my heart. And, as I ran up that hill he reminded me that He would, if I trusted Him completely, make my paths level. I had never run up that hill so easily in all the dozens of times I had run it.

13. Arkansas Razorbaptist (http://arkansasrazorbaptist.blogspot.com/). Another blogger I've never met (but want to do so soon!!!). When I first wrote about our decision to change careers to missions, they heard the story and wrote about it on their blog (which is "slightly" more read and acclaimed than mine). It was such a blessing and many people wrote great words of encouragement. Alan Cross did the same.

14. All the dozens of encouraging notes and calls we have received.

15. All the hours that my wife and I have spent together praying. although we had often counseled young married couples of the importance of praying together (the pithy saying "the couple that prays together stays together!"), we found that Satan did everything he could to prevent it, and we usually succumbed. Since following God's direction, just like with our family devotions, we have a renewed commitment to our marriage, our families, and to God. Praying together is a natural and desirable thing for the first time in a long time.

16. Every where we turned in Hawaii, people were giving us things. A borrowed vehicle for a trip to church or the store. A gallon of milk. A home cooked dinner. A pair of shorts. And, these things were coming from others who had very little themselves!

17. Bill Barley and the Living Stones Church!!! We went there during our entire stay. It is where we met David and Wendy Price. It is where we took tons of great pictures of our kids. But, even more so was the first sermon Bill preached. He hit on Hebrews 11:15-16. There we are reminded of Abraham and Sarah, who could have returned to their homeland but never looked back and realized their longing for a better place. As Bill shared these verses, both Tara and I looked at each other knowing that they were speaking directly to us.

18. Bill Barley number 2. Well, after week two at the Living Stones, I introduced myself to Bill. As it turned out he had been a lawyer for 12 years in Florida before following God's call into pastoring. Needless to say our friendship was borne and I look forward to a few more shared coffees and great teaching when we return.

19. David Spruell. Youth Minister at a large church in Houston, Texas, Champion Forest Baptist Church. He was an accountant a few years ago in Fayetteville and attended the sunday school class I had the blessing of teaching. I called him from Hawaii to tell him our great news and change of calls because I knew he could relate. He had already heard and was ready for my call because he wanted to ask me to come speak to his church! I hadn't thought for one second before calling him about that possibility, but it was such encouragement to hear his excitement about our story.

20. Our nephew, Carter Calico, moved in with us at the beginning of the summer to go to summer school at the University of Arkansas. This was well before we knew I would be quitting my job and leading us all to Hawaii. As a result, though, when we did leave quite suddenly, he was already in our home, able to house sit, mow, and take care of a few things for us.

Well, this is now the (almost) eternal post and I could go on. Remember these were just 20 things that happened in about two weeks time. Each of them, however, spoke volumes to our family as we stepped out in faith. So many more have happened since, and I hope to write a few more in the upcoming week. And, i haven't even mentioned people like David Roth (http://www.workmatters.org), who met with me faithfully during the months prior to my decision, helping me through some angst over my job, career, and Christian walk. As I shared coffee with him this morning, God began showing me ways that we had been iron sharpening iron, even though I had no idea that I was encouraging him, too. That was such a blessing.

Thank you for taking the time to read all of this. I hope it blessed you. If nothing else, it will be a reminder to me that God started this and He will finish it. Philippians 1:6. We love you.

2006-08-20T22:47:00.000-05:00

Proverb of the Day

Much of the commenting I've seen of late on other blogs brought this verse to life for me today. Proverbs 20:3 says "It is to a man's honor to avoid strife, but every fool is quick to quarrel." I know that I am often a fool when it comes to arguments. And, it seems I am not alone in that folly as I peruse a few of my favorite blogs. Father, I pray that we would die to ourselves and what we perceive to be our rights and righteousness and wisdom and let your love, truth, wisdom, and knowledge work through us as we draw near to You as Your sons and daughters.

I also wanted to share how much I have been encouraged by Alan Cross. If you don't regularly check out his blog, I wish you would. It is thoughtful, intelligent, and not self-righteous. Moreover, he would love your prayer support. Check it out. I link to it, but also it is at downshoredrift.com.

Finally, I wanted to share these words of wisdom from one of my Methodist pastor friends. I had the blessing of hearing his sermon today. "We need to train diligently to be someone who desires to have the character of Christ inwardly so that we can be more like Christ outwardly." "When you feel gassed and used up, it may be because you've tried to act like Christ before you really were like Christ." "Why would you expect to be able to be like Jesus without having the training that goes with it?" He shared what a first century Jewish disciple was. They were those who followed their rabbi so closely that they hoped to look like, be like, walk like, talk like, and live like their rabbi. He shared that it took great discipline, just as is described in Timothy, through worship, unhurried reading, memorizing, meditating, fasting, solitude, jounaling, accountability, praying, listening, etc. And, he emphasized that it isn't that these works save us, but that we can't expect to live effective Christian lives without training to do so just as a professional athlete can't expect to be effective without going through the fundamentals hundreds of thousands of times.

2006-08-20T06:02:00.000-05:00

Some friends of ours recently began going to a counselor (oh no, the C word) for their marriage's sake. The husband shared a story about how he was recently talking to the wife of a youth pastor while they both were visiting a mutual friend at the hospital. As he listened to her talk about how her marriage's main focus was her children and that they put their marriage on the back burner for the kids, he was burdened by it. Rather than just tell her that she really needed to focus on her husband and her marriage, chide her, or quote scripture at her, he began his encouragement by saying something like, "my wife and I recently began counseling to save our marriage." Well, to make a long story short, his honesty and openness gave her the ability to trust him and really listen to what he had to say. It is rare in today's culture for people to share from their hearts, particularly to be vulnerable in so doing. We can all share our opinions about what other people do or say, but to share our weaknesses and feelings? It seems we'd rather go to the dentist. And because he and his wife were so willing to share their struggles with us, we were more open with them and it made for a wonderful evening of mutual encouragment and love.

May we trust God to be our strength when we are weak and not believe the lie that we have to show others how "perfect" we are.

2006-08-19T22:16:00.000-05:00

PROVERB OF THE DAY

The fear of the Lord leads to life: Then one rests content, untouched by trouble. Proverbs 19:23. When we walk by faith in the reality of who God is, trusting wholly in Him and not leaning on our own understanding, he makes our paths straight and level and we are able to rest, contendly, in Him, untouched by the troubles and trials of this world. Note that it doesn't say that there aren't troubles; it simply says that we won't be touched by trouble. Why? Because we live knowing that He is God. He is infinite. He is love. He is all powerful. He is all knowing. He is sovereign. He always keeps his promises. His purpose always prevails (Proverbs 19:21). We can truly rest in Him. If you feel unrest, then perhaps it is something or someone else you are placing your trust in. May the reality of who HE is wash over you as you begin to breathe deeply and taste and see that He is good and rest peacefully in His tender care. Amen.

2006-08-17T19:48:00.000-05:00

I hope it is as obvious to people who don't know me as it is to me that in this picture i am exhausted. I definitely don't post the photo out of vanity. But the picture illustrates a couple of things. First, the cool part: the steam in the background, about 2.5 miles away, is being produced by molten lava rolling into the Pacific Ocean from the active volcano on the Big Island. Second, I realized something today that was entirely new to me, and, as I pondered it I remembered this picture.

What is this new learning? What profound revelation did God give me? It wasn't anything earth shattering. It simply was this: Ministry is hard work. You see, in the picture above, my family and I had been driving and touring and hiking around the Big Island of Hawaii for about ten hours. At the moment my wife, Tara, took this lovely photograph, I had been carrying that 30 pounds of 2-year-old for some distance over lava fields to see that steam behind me. And, as a result of all that excitement, fun, and hard work, I was on my last leg.

Ministry, and all it entails, is like that. Yes, it is fun. Yes, it is exciting. Yes, it is rewarding. But, yes, it is hard. There are aspects of it that aren't fun or exciting. And, today, as I felt like I really needed more coffee to make it another step and to smile as I shared with another individual, God showed me a little big more of Himself. And, praise God, no matter how hard the work is, when it is done for His glory and consistent with His will, it is all rewarding.

I spoke today to a great man of faith who shared about how the past year and a half of his ministry had been the time of his life. Understand, the past year and a half of his ministry had probably been some of the most challenging he had ever faced. But, because of his love for God and the grateful heart God had given him for seeing God's glory even through all of the insanity, his perspective on it was one of joy, which is quite different than many looking from the outside in might have.

My wife and I look back on the month of July 2006 as the best month of our lives. Even though we had no vehicle at our disposal and logged miles every day on our feet, we ate many things we didn't like and couldn't afford to just choose to go out to eat, we moved from sharing way too much square feet to about 500, and we were thousands of miles from everything we were used to, God blessed us beyond measure. During just the first two weeks we could write down 19 distinct happenings or answers to prayer affirming He had led us to be there. I'd type out all my stories of answered prayer but i'm afraid the length of the post would be too daunting to most and I'd rather just tell you personally!

All of that to say, God is so amazingly good. He truly does work all things for good for those who love God and are called to His purpose. When He tells us to be thankful in all circumstances, He also makes it possible for us to be. What a wonderful God we serve. In fact, what other god is there that actually came not to be served, but to serve? What other god doesn't enslave us; instead, we have the God who loves and frees us and came to give us an abundant life? While we may be called upon to work hard for His glory, and to do all things as though we were working for the Almighty Creator of the Universe and beyond, we get to yoke up with Jesus Christ, the one in whom God placed all supremacy, and to whom we can give all of our burdens. Praise be to God! What sweet release and rest He provides!!!!!

2006-08-15T22:53:00.000-05:00

THE STORY OF FJ MINISTRIES

FJ Ministries is the vision God laid on our hearts. Our mission of F.A.I.T.H. is "Families reaching families as Avenues to the nations, Igniting passion for God and compassion for people, Teaching and training with Hearts and hands revealed." Colossians 2:6. We pray tha tGod will enable us to reach families and facilitate their particpation in the Great Commission. May our heart's passion be for God and for serving others and, in so doing, encourage others to the same passion.

FJ were the two letters God gave us individually on July 26, 2006, in Kona, Hawaii, as we prayed over what our ministry should be. Tara and I prayed together more in the last couple of months than we have in our twelve year marriage.

For Tara, FJ was "for Jim." Jim was a friend of Tara's during her teenage years who had a heart for God and missions. He had gone to Haiti as a young teenager and wanted to see God's ministry furthered. Unfortunately, for reasons only God truly knows, Jim decided to end his life. In the wake of the grief over that loss, Tara told God that she wanted to do whatever it was God had planned for Jim to do. It was not until the night we were praying together some twenty years later that God reminded her of that promise to Him.

For Bryan, FJ was "finding Jubilee." Jubilee was our first "child." We were both in school, without any income, but we saved to buy a poodle. We named her Jubilee and we paid $400 for her. Ten days after we received her, she died in a terrible accident. It happened the same day our niece, Corissa Calico, was born and as I rushed to the hospital to see Corissa's birth. I was carrying Jubilee outside our apartment to let her "use the lawn," when something startled her and she jumped. As I tried to catch her she was flipped head down and fell onto a concrete sidewalk, suffering a fatal head injury at the tender age of 9 weeks.

Jubilee also, of course, is the year God told the Israelites to rest for a second sabbath year, letting the land lay fallow, the slave be set free, and all debts be forgiven. It was to occur every 50th year (following the 49th, or 7th of 7 Sabbath years). Leviticus 25. Unfortunately, the Israelites never had the faith to obey God in this precious gift of grace and failed to follow His command regarding entering His rest during the Year of Jubilee.

We hope that through FJ Ministries we can teach others about entering God's rest and Jubilee--that God would increase all of our faith and bring us to unity and to the fullness of our gifts so tha the world may know that Jesus is their salvation. Romans 12, John 17. Jesus taught that "unless a kernel of wheat falls to the ground and dies, it remains only a single seed. But if it dies, it produces many seeds. The man who loves his life will lose it, while the man who hates his life in this world will keep it for eternal life. Whoever serves me must follow me; and where I am, myservant will also be. My Father honors the one who serves me." John 12:24-26. We now know that the deaths that God reminded us of as we prayed, and our own willingness to give up our own lives, will produce many seeds in the lives of innumerable people, thus bringing God glory and showing that Jesus is the reason for our hope to all the world.

What was really fun was then decompressing after our time of prayer and realizing that God's gift of FJ to us also stood for such things as Families for Jesus, Forgiveness in Jesus, Faith in Jesus, Faith and Joy, Following Jesus, Finding Jesus, Finding Joy, Fellowship in Jesus, Friendship in Jesus, Friend of Jesus, Faithfulness and Joy, and so on and so on. And, in that we rejoiced as God was already beginning to multiply His work in our hearts.

2006-08-11T21:40:00.000-05:00

Book Tag - Tagged by Kevin Bussey

The rules are that it can be any book besides the Bible.

1. One book that changed your life: Desiring God, John Piper
2. One book that you’ve read more than once: Finishing Strong, Stu Weber
3. One book I’d want on a desert island: Wikipedia (that’s probably cheating), but basically some survival guide!
4. One book that made me laugh: Canterbury Tales
5. One book that made me cry: Redeeming Love, Francine Rivers
6. One book that you wish you had written: The Chronicles of Narnia, C.S. Lewis
7. One book you wish had never been written: Silmarillion, JRR Tolkien (I kept trying to read it all)
8. One book that you are currently reading: The Weight of Glory, C.S. Lewis
9. One book that you’ve been meaning to read: The New Man, Thomas Merton

I’d add that some great classics to read are Catcher in the Rye, Lord of the Flies, anything by Shakespeare, Brave New World, We, 1984, anything by Hemingway, The Scarlet Letter, Pride and Prejudice, Les Miserables, Tolkien’s the Hobbit and the Lord of the Rings Trilogy, oh, and of course the Hardy Boys, Nancy Drew, Encyclopedia Brown, and anything by Louis L'aMour

2006-08-10T15:42:00.000-05:00

This is to give a visual to the below poems, written in honor of each of my three children. :)

2006-08-10T10:48:00.000-05:00

I wrote these for Tara on Mother's Day this year

Tanner Gracen

A mind full of wonder—
Ever thinking;
Always growing,
Artistically creating the world anew.
So fun to watch, this work of genius
As he flutters from one focus to another,
Needing not to attend to one thing long.
For as quickly as he sees
So does he understand,
And off to something else, a fantasy land.
He is beautiful; he is passionate,
Full of life, filled with awe—
His limits likely to be only those self-imposed.
Protect him from pride's great fall.
A gift to be cherished;
A breath to be held—
Let me not do anything but enable him to your hand.

Keaton Tait

Deeply does he think,
Ever on the brink
Of sharing something wise,
A twinkle in his eyes.
A handsome joy to behold;
A surprise with hair of gold;
His heart full and alive—
Deeper than anyone can dive—
Hard to know what lies inside,
But oh the wonder, and the pride,
When he trusts you and reveals his soul.
So sweet, so calm, always bold—
Though in the middle I pray he not believe
The lie that says you are forgotten.
Instead, may real love he evermore receive.
A gift to be cherished;
A breath to be held—
Let me not do anything but enable him to your hand.

Regan Cambryn

To think of her is to smile, to giggle—
For energy and drive is her heart's song.
Only two now, so much yet to learn,
But you can see the determination burn
In her eyes and in her strength;
Her will to do few can meet.
So teach me how to lead her to be meek
Without interfering with her spirit or her cheek.
As she grows in beauty, and in wisdom,
May she invest her gifts in the everlasting.
Though the baby and only girl
Let her not be deceived by a world about "me."
Let her reckless abandon be
A worshipful sacrifice to thee.
A gift to be cherished;
A breath to be held—
Let me not do anything but enable her to your hand.

2006-08-08T13:19:00.000-05:00

RESTING IN THE LORD

"Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light." Matthew 11:28-30.

Why do we struggle so with finding rest in this world? Is it because we are so much busier today than at any other time in history? I doubt it. Sure, we may seem busier today, but if you take away our technologies of convenience and speed, putting us back on our feet to walk everywhere, forcing us to work more with our hands to cultivate our food and make whatever we need to live, you suddenly realize that people of the past were just as busy as we are, if not more, but they simply had to do different things to occupy their daily lives than we do. If anything, we are less busy today, more bored, and occupy our time with things that have more potential for harm. You would think with all of our leisure time we would be more rested than any generation in history; instead, we are suffering from a myriad of mental and emotional illnesses while seeking any and every thing to entertain ourselves.

Hebrews 3 and 4 make it clear why we fail to rest. In verse 19 of chapter 3 it says "they were not able to enter [his rest] because of their unbelief." Because the generation of Israelites who left Egypt's slavery failed to believe God's promises, they wandered in the desert for 40 years and were not granted access to his rest in the promised land because of their unbelief. This factual history also is a great word picture of the spiritual reality that when we doubt God we cannot enter into His rest as described above in Matthew 11 by Jesus.

What are some examples of things God has promised us?

2 Peter 1:3-4: His divine power has given us everything we need for life and godliness through our knowledge of him who called us by his own glory and goodness. Through these he has given us his very great and precious promises, so that through them you may participate in the divine nature and escape the corruption in the world caused by evil desires.

Philippians 4:19: And my God will meet all your needs according to his glorious riches in Christ Jesus.

Romans 8:28-39: And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose. For those God foreknew he also predestined to be conformed to the likeness of his Son, that he might be the firstborn among many brothers. And those he predestined, he also called; those he called, he also justified; those he justified, he also glorified. What, then, shall we say in response to this? If God is for us, who can be against us? He who did not spare his own Son, but gave him up for us all—how will he not also, along with him, graciously give us all things? Who will bring any charge against those whom God has chosen? It is God who justifies. Who is he that condemns? Christ Jesus, who died—more than that, who was raised to life—is at the right hand of God and is also interceding for us. Who shall separate us from the love of Christ? Shall trouble or hardship or persecution or famine or nakedness or danger or sword? As it is written: "For your sake we face death all day long; we are considered as sheep to be slaughtered." No, in all these things we are more than conquerors through him who loved us. For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord.

James 1:2-8: Consider it pure joy, my brothers, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance. Perseverance must finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything. If any of you lacks wisdom, he should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to him. But when he asks, he must believe and not doubt, because he who doubts is like a wave of the sea, blown and tossed by the wind. That man should not think he will receive anything from the Lord; he is a double-minded man, unstable in all he does.

The question you must ask yourself is whether you really believe these promises (and the many more throughout God's word). If it seems you aren't living the life described by God in the above passages, then you must ask why. The Word of God is living and active, penetrating through your very soul, able to judge the thoughts and attitudes of your heart. Hebrews 4:11-12. Let it work through you. Pray as David did "Search me, O God, and know my heart; test me and know my anxious thoughts. See if there is any offensive way in me, and lead me in the way everlasting." Psalm 139:23-24. If you doubt at all, you are a double-minded man. And, what does that mean?? You are unstable, mentally, emotionally, spiritually, and will not be able to rest. You are schizophrenic (literally have a "split mind"). And, interestingly, what happens to schizophrenics is that they become more and more consumed with... themselves.

I've written a long post, but God's word sums it up amazingly in two little verses many young Christians memorize early on:

"Trust in the Lord with all your heart [not just some or most of it] and lean not on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge Him and He will direct your paths [or will make your paths straight/level]." Proverbs 3:5-6.

If you are interpreting scripture based on your life experience rather than simply believing that God is who He says He is; that is, if you are leaning on your own understanding and experience rather than believing His promises, expect to have an anxious heart that seems unable to rest. As you find yourself needing that "drug" of choice, whatever it is, that is less than the meat of His word, the truth of His spirit, and the power of His gospel, ask God to search your heart with the sword of His word to see if there is any offensive way in you.

2006-08-07T13:02:00.000-05:00

These are a few of the sights from our trip around the Big Island. I will post more in the future. The one of the family is taken from the porch of a beautiful green church in Waimea. The boys are running down a path to the overlook of Waipio Valley, one of the most beautiful places in the world. The waterfall is Akaka Falls. The cross is a part of a cemetery overlooking the Pacific on the East side of the Island.

"The heavens declare the glory of God; the skies proclaim the work of his hands." Psalm 19:1

2006-08-02T12:19:00.000-05:00

MEMORIZING SCRIPTURE

From today's Proverb, Proverbs 2:

My son, if you accept my words and store up my commands within you, turning your ear to wisdom and applying your heart to understanding, and if you call out for insight and cry aloud for understanding, and if you look for it as for silver and search for it as for hidden treasure, then you will understand the fear of the LORD and find the knowledge of God.

The above verses set some conditions on our understanding the fear of the LORD and finding the knowledge of God. Notice that they aren't optional conditions, nor are they singular in nature. Instead, the scripture states that if you do the above 8 things, then you will understand. Further down in Proverbs 2 it promises that if you have God's wisdom it will save you from wicked men and the adulterous woman. I'd say that these are definitely things we want to be saved from.

So, when was the last time you memorized a verse or verses of the Bible? Do you find it difficult to do so? Do you set aside time, strategically to do so? I fail in this area. Can you share any encouraging words or practical advice to help people be better at storing up God's commands within our hearts??

2006-07-31T15:54:00.000-05:00

INDESCRIBABLE PEACE

Here is Keaton, our 5-year old, resting peacefully in my lap. He isn't the one to jump ecstatically for joy, but his subtle expressions demonstrate oh so well his heart. Seeing the faint traces of punch on his lips, the calmness in his eyes (and thus his soul), and the joy in the upward curves of his lips brings this daddy great joy and indescribable, and incomprehensible, peace.

"Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus."

Philippians 4:6-7

2006-07-31T13:52:00.000-05:00

SIMPLE JOYS

Tanner is so filled with joy after his great catch of a gecko (they are really fast!). "Then maidens will dance and be glad, young men and old as well. I will turn their mourning into gladness; I will give them comfort and joy instead of sorrow." Jeremiah 31:13.

2006-07-30T02:24:00.000-05:00

HEEEEEEEEEERE'S REGAN!!!!

We think she misses her trampoline...She seems to enjoy using Bryan's, Tanner's and Keaton's bellies, and, of course, our apartment's couch...

Blessed be God— he heard me praying. He proved he's on my side; I've thrown my lot in with him. Now I'm jumping for joy, and shouting and singing my thanks to him. Psalm 28:6 (MSG).

2006-07-28T21:35:00.000-05:00

SURVEY YOUR DENOMINATIONAL "FIT"

Here is an interesting survey that tests what denominational bent with which you best fit. Some of the questions are a little oversimplified and you may have a hard time selecting an answer, but I found it fun to think through. (At some point I need to learn how to put cool graphics in these posts!)

http://selectsmart.com/plus/select.php?url=denomtradition

2006-07-27T23:20:00.000-05:00

THAT WE MAY BE AS ONE

Isn't it great how God's purpose is woven through the entire bible? And, isn't it great that we get to participate in that purpose and be made whole through doing so? God reveals to us in Matthew 24 that things will be brought to completion when the gospel is preached to all the world. And, Jesus prayed for us in John 17, asking that we may all be as one, just as Jesus and the Father are as one. All too often we stop at the oneness Christ prayed for and forget why Jesus prayed that for us. The reason was so that the world would believe that Jesus was truly sent by God, the Father. So, I don't think it is too much of a leap to say that if we really want to fulfill the Great Commission and see the gospel brought to the entire world, all Christians, not just any one denomination, must work together to see it through. God will be greatly glorified when men and women who are a part of the body of Christ from a diversity of denominational backgrounds come together with a single purpose, to proclaim the good news to the Nations. I wish we would lay down our fine sounding arguments and carry the message of Christ together to all the world. Does anyone out there have some ideas about how we can make this happen???

2006-07-24T02:39:00.000-05:00

Our day out began at the Living Stones Church in Kona, Hawaii. The old stump upon which my family is standing sits behind the church looking out on the Pacific. The cross is right behind the one room church. The church is covered with the volcanic rock covering most of the Big Island.

Our day out ended with the sun setting over the Pacific. We enjoyed a picnic dinner with a number of families from the YWAM base in Kona at the Place of Refuge. The Hawaiians had a place of refuge similar to the places of refuge ancient Jews set up in accordance with God's law. Hawaiian law punished infractions by death, but provided a place for refuge and forgiveness. This is where we were in the two pictures below, one of Regan our two-year-old, and one of my wife, holding the setting sun in her hand.

God is amazing!

2006-07-22T02:38:00.000-05:00

2 Timothy 1:6-7 (plus a little at no charge)

6For this reason I remind you to fan into flame the gift of God, which is in you through the laying on of my hands. 7For God did not give us a spirit of timidity, but a spirit of power, of love and of self-discipline. (NIV)

And the special gift of ministry you received when I laid hands on you and prayed—keep that ablaze! God doesn't want us to be shy with his gifts, but bold and loving and sensible. (MSG)

6For this reason I remind you to kindle afresh the gift of God which is in you through the laying on of my hands. 7For God has not given us a spirit of timidity, but of power and love and discipline. (NASB)

6 Therefore I remind you to stir up the gift of God which is in you through the laying on of my hands. 7 For God has not given us a spirit of fear, but of power and of love and of a sound mind. (NKJV)

To stir up, kindle afresh, fan into flame, keep ablaze the gift of God, the charisma of God, the passion we have... Paul reminds Timothy to do this right at the beginning of this great letter. It isn't without import that he reminds him to do this while reminding him of his spiritual heritage. It is similar to what the author of Hebrews does in chapters 11 and 12. After detailing the rich history of giants in the faith, and sharing how they didn't look back, but looked ahead to an eternal inheritance, the author then writes that we should throw off all that hinders and fix our eyes on Jesus!!

What are you passionate about? What are your gifts? What makes your burn with a fire that can't be quenched but to do it with all your heart unto God?? Perhaps you are in a period of your life where you don't feel very passionate about God or your life. Look back for a moment and remember a time when your faith was alive and real, true and sincere, passionate and compelling. If it was real then, it is just as real now, but something may be hindering you, entangling you, choking you. Throw that aside and cling to what was real. Jesus. Jesus. Jesus. He alone is real and in Him all things are held together. Hold on to that. Believe it. Cling to it. As though your life depends on it... because it does.

Then and only then can you lose that spirit that binds.. .that spirit of fear and timidity and dread and find your spirit of zeal and fire. Then you can live that spirit of power (dunamis....dynamite! no, not napoleon), agape love (when you seem to only care about yourself and yet feel so empty in that find out why you are so powerless, what is entangling you, what is choking out your passions), and have a sound mind.

I will never forget a sunday school lesson (in part because my wife will remind me from time to time) when I taught on King Nebuchadnezzar, when he grew so proud that God struck him mad and he ended up with dreadlocks in the wild eating bugs. I looked up from the Word and said, with all sincerity, that I was "this close to being like Nebuchadnezzar." Why was that? Because I was bound in a spirit of pride and independence, thinking that I was godly enough in myself to be an exception to God's principles. I was saved, seeking Him (generally), and often experienced His love, power, and grace. But, I was putting other idols before Him. The result? I was losing His power, love and my mind. With that I was losing that godly virtue of moderation and self-control. Philippians 4:4-6. As we lose that we become like the city without walls mentioned in Proverbs. We are defenseless to the enemy. Proverbs 25:28. Satan has us right where he wants us.

But, praise God, he calls us to remember our salvation, His victories in our lives, our spiritual heritage. He brings to mind the hog calls that lead to divine appointments, the all night prayer sessions with a friend, the times sharing Jesus, the day in the orphanage or the prison or the visit to a hospital bed, the vision of two paths and which one we must follow. Those memories can give us hope. Why did God constantly tell the Israelites to remember how they left Egypt? Psalm 105-106. He tells us the same today! And Praise Him he promises us peace, soundness of mind, joy, gratitude, love... Philippians 4:4-8, Jeremiah 17:5-15, Psalm 1, 2 Peter 1:3-10.

Look back on how God worked in your life to save you from failure. Don't dwell on the failures or on things you thought were bad or evil; instead, fix your eyes on Jesus. Remember who Jesus was and is and will be and what He did in your life. Fix your eyes on Jesus and His call for your life: to live passionately for God and compassionately for others. Matthew 22:36-40. Make sure of your call! 2 Peter 1:3-10. Through His grace and power alone, I love you, but, more importantly, God loves you. Let Him. Let go. I AM NOT. HE IS. I AM HIS.

2006-07-18T19:46:00.000-05:00

PLEASE PRAY FOR US

Please pray that our family would know where God is leading us to conduct our training. In YWAM lingo, that training is DTS (Discipleship Training School), and there are a number of locations that can accommodate families where we could attend DTS. For a description of DTS's, go to http://www.uofnkona.edu/dts/mdts.html. We want to continue down the path God is lighting with the lamp of His word and follow Him wherever He leads. We believe God is leading us to be catalysts for a ministry that empowers families to reach families, advancing and igniting passion for God and compassion for people by teaching and training in His Word, with our hearts revealed to others and tender and broken before Him. Thank you for your prayers, encouragement and love. (fyi...the picture is from earlier this summer in Branson, Missouri)

2006-07-16T19:31:00.000-05:00

HOW A HOG CALL LED TO A DIVINE APPOINTMENT

We had the most amazing blessing today and it was in answer to a prayer that Tara, my wife, prayed this morning during church. For the two Sundays we have been here in Kailua-Kona, Hawaii, we have attended the Living Stones church about two miles away.

At the beginning of the service and during the worship, she was praying silently. She asked that God would help us make some tremendous relationships at the service. I had no idea she was praying for that. Well, after the service, (we almost didn't make it to church because time flew by this morning, but we are so glad we did), God led me to make a beeline to the pastor. As it turned out, he was an attorney for 12 years in Florida (an FSU Seminole fan) before surrendering to God's call to become a pastor.

His name is Bill Barley and he leads a fantastic church that sits right on the ocean. They do two services and both are overflowing with people. His sermon this morning was out of Ephesians 1:15-23 and was about believing God's promises and living them. Of particular note to both Tara and me, separately, was Hebrews 11:13-16, which say:

13All these people were still living by faith when they died. They did not receive the things promised; they only saw them and welcomed them from a distance. And they admitted that they were aliens and strangers on earth. 14People who say such things show that they are looking for a country of their own. 15If they had been thinking of the country they had left, they would have had opportunity to return. 16Instead, they were longing for a better country—a heavenly one. Therefore God is not ashamed to be called their God, for he has prepared a city for them.

I told the pastor where I was from (Fayetteville, Arkansas), and that his sermon, if for no one else in the room, was God's word for my family that day. His being an attorney before going into the ministry and the sermon he preached alone was cool, but God had even more in store. I walked outside to get some of the fresh coffee and snacks they had prepared. I never got there, though, because...

Unbeknownst to me, the next guy who talked to the pastor told him he was from Magnolia, Arkansas. Well, I had just told the pastor I was from Fayetteville, Arkansas, so the pastor asked him... Are you here with Bryan?

This second gentleman said, no, of course, but was intrigued that some other guy was here in the middle of no where, Big Island, Hawaii, attending church. So, the next thing I know I'm just starting to get some coffee outside and i hear "Wooooooo, pig!" And, then I hear it again, and it registers that someone is hog calling toward me. I know I haven't seen anyone I know there...I turn and there's this guy, whom I then meet, named David Price. He just is beaming, with this big smile, friendly face, and warm heart.

Then, guess what?! He is an attorney, a solo practitioner, from Magnolia, Arkansas. He and his wife, Wendy, and their two kids, Jacob and Nick, are there on vacation. They had just arrived on Thursday. The night before they decided they wanted to go to church and were looking for a Baptist church. As they glanced through the paper, David saw the advertisement for the Living Stones (a nondenominational church) and that the pastor was preaching on living God's promises. It compelled him to go there.

David and I end up talking for the next hour, pray together, he blesses us with a gift, he teaches a sunday school class and can't wait to share with them about us and wants them to adopt us. Then, when we start sharing where Tara and I grew up (I grew up in Prairie Grove, Arkansas), he is blown away and shares with us that his brother-in-law is the pastor of my home town church where I attended for several years.

We exchanged all our contact information and I felt like we were life long friends all in an hour. This is how one hog call led to a clear divine appointment. It was amazing!!!!!!!! It is one of about 20 things to add to my list of how God has been moving in the past month in so many ways. It is humbling because I know God is moving like this all the time, but all too often I let the world choke out my ability to see it.

Just like the pastor spoke this morning, do we believe Philippians 4:19 and Romans 8 or not? Will he supply all our needs according to his riches in glory? Of course He will! It isn't name it claim it, which is just self-interested and trying to turn God into Santa Claus or a genie (and ourselves into God), but it is "believe it and receive it" and then act out in gratitude, knowing that God has already finished everything we need. 2 Peter 1:3! And, Ephesians 1:3: Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, who has blessed us in the heavenly realms with every spiritual blessing in Christ.

Finally, make this (and look at all of the surrounding verses) your prayer for your own relationship and for my family's relationship with God today: I pray also that the eyes of your heart may be enlightened in order that you may know the hope to which he has called you, the riches of his glorious inheritance in the saints.

May God give you the grace to see Him more clearly every moment of your life.

2006-07-14T02:58:00.000-05:00

Do you ever feel at a complete loss in your life--feeling like no matter what you do it just simply never results in fulfillment? Jesus told us clearly in John 10:10 that he came to give us an abundant life--a fulfilled life. So, what keeps us from it?? Examine your ways anytime you feel unfulfilled.

Just as the way of folly in Proverbs 9 is seeking your own way, Jeremiah 17:5-10 spells it out for us. If we trust in man (which would include ourselves) we are cursed. In fact, any time we are trusting in our own strength we are "turn[ed] away from the Lord." Jeremiah 17:5.

I don't think we think of it that way, but we should. If we aren't with Him, then we are against Him. Matthew 12:30, Luke 11:23. If we are seeking our own interests first, then we are turned away from Him and we are committing idolatry. There is no middle ground.

In contrast, if we are trusting in the Lord, we are blessed and will experience the same satisfaction that a tree planted by fresh water does. Jeremiah 17:7-8; see also Psalm 1. We will thrive no matter the circumstances, because we always have that fresh flow of life-giving water, just as Christ promised the woman at the well. John 4.

My constant self-seeking is overwhelming. I know I must die daily and follow HIm moment by moment, but I fail at nearly every turn. It is amazing He loves me so much that He sent His son to die for me. And that He keeps showing me grace after grace, tenderly comforting me after my self-inflicted wounds. Praise be to the God of Jonah, of Moses, of David, and of so many others who needed second (and more) chances! I know whom I must serve, because to serve any other yields a life of poverty, slavery, thirst, hunger, and anguish. But, serving and trusting the God who is I AM will result in real life, a life of love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control. WOW!!!

2006-07-12T18:15:00.000-05:00

Proverbs 9 shows the incredible difference between the way of God and the ways of the world as it provides a word picture of wisdom and folly calling out to us, both at the highest places of the city. Wisdom has a house, with seven pillars, and has a complete dinner, with meat, wine, fully prepared, and free to eat for any who will humble himself and enter. Wisdom is there to sustain us. Folly, in contrast, calls out to us to enter in and, rather than providing sustenance tells us to find our own way. The way of God is dependence on Him. And what is truly amazing about that is that God is fully self-sustaining and needs nothing, not even me (think Job 38-42). He overflows with love and provision and is ready to draw near to any who would draw near to them and bless them to bring glory to His name (James 4:8; Psalm 115). Folly, the way of the world, the way of Satan, calls out to us to serve ourselves, to be our own "god" just as Lucifer tempted Eve and Adam in the garden (Genesis 3:5). So, are you living in dependence on God or in dependence on yourself? Ask yourselves this, because in the answer you can see if your way is one clothed in Wisdom or in folly. Don't just ask once; instead, continually examine your path and your motivations to see if you are following Christ or following self-interest (2 Corinthians 13:5, Lamentations 3:37-41). We must die daily to ourselves and live for Christ (Luke 9:23, 1 Corinthians 15).

God is so good. We are in Kona, Hawaii at the University of the Nations, a ministry of Youth With a Mission. We have been studying the ministry of missions work and are seeking His will for our family in this. As we begin this journey we are, for the first time, graced with the time and desire to spend time as a family in devotion, prayer, and simply serving one another in a way we hadn't before. It is truly wonderful. Thank you for your prayers for us.

2006-07-02T17:24:00.000-05:00

WOW! I don’t even know what to say. That in and of itself, if you know me at all, is a miracle. For some time God has been moving in our hearts, trying to gain our attention. For at least that same amount of time we weren't really letting myself have His attention. We had lots of things “to do.” We had one, then two, then three incredible kids. And, even before them, we had our marriage, our jobs, a dog, a house, and friends, and, well, “life.” But over the course of the last several years, God has been reawakening us to the fact that we had to let go of all the things we were claiming for ourselves and find our pleasure solely in Him. (For a great read and explanation of how God fulfills us, see John Piper's book Desiring God.)

Through good, bad, and ugly, God finally said, “enough.” I have better plans for you than any you could make up. So, it is with great fear, hopefully wisdom, I know folly, joy, tears, smiles, and love, that we are writing to you that we are leaping to a new life. I've left my job as an attorney for Tyson Foods, Inc. to prepare our family to serve as missionaries. Call it an early mid-life crisis if you want (i'm 35); I pray it is obedience.

I don’t think it is any accident that this happens in the middle of a year and right at the time we Americans begin celebrating our freedom. For the first time in years we suddenly feel more free than we have in a very long time. God has shown us how to line up our God-given passions with his purpose and plan for our lives.

We will begin training to serve as missionaries with Youth with a Mission (YWAM) on July 8th. Please check them out at http://www.ywam.org/, whether you know anything about them or not. It is a non-profit organization dedicated to the advancement of the gospel of Jesus Christ to the world--from Albania to Zimbabwe, Australia to the US, and Mexico to Madasgascar. This is our calling and desire and, at this time, we don’t know where all we will be taken, but we are ready to go. Friends who have been or are a part of YWAM have served in such places as Arkansas, Cameroon, Mexico, Albania, Hawaii, Columbia, Kazakhstan, and the list goes on. We will be, over the next month, seeking God's will for our first "mission" while participating in a month-long training at the feet of John and Jane Ray, long-time friends of ours who have been with YWAM for 18 and 22 years, respectively.

We know it sounds crazy. We know that because it sounds crazy to us. Here is a biblical word picture of where we are. There was this guy named Jonah. He had a happy life. One day God told him to go to Ninevah. That was just plain craziness to Jonah. Instead of obeying he got on a boat to Spain. There’s nothing wrong with a nice trip to Spain. Many people did it. Meanwhile, many people around Jonah stayed right where they were and did their normal things like growing olives, raising kids, buying and selling, studying the Torah, etc. And, the others on that boat to Spain were just doing their normal thing - sailing, trading, fishing, whatever. None of those things that everyone else was doing was wrong and, by all appearances, were exactly the things they should have been doing. The only person who was doing anything wrong (at least based on what we see in Jonah's book) in all this was Jonah. He wasn’t obeying what God told him to do. So, he had to do something utterly insane. He had to jump off a perfectly good ship into the middle of a raging ocean during a horrific storm, and I imagine there was no land in sight. Similarly, now, God is telling our family that we need to go in a different direction. We came to a point where we just had to JUMP! And, although it looks like folly to quit/leave/lose/abandon a great job with a Fortune 100 company with three young children (see pictures in one of my previous posts cuz they are beautiful!), a big house, and so on while having no other job except a dream of becoming a missionary, when God tells you to jump, well, jumping is a good thing to do no matter what it looks like around you or what makes you do so. And, now, just as God saved Jonah from that tempestuous sea and delivered him to being one of the greatest prophets of all time, we have to believe that if we are trusting Him with our entire lives, he will provide a way for us.

In the mean time we have begun making the shift from being “for profit” to being not for profit and will need your support. We aren't asking anyone to send any money just yet, but will send out more information soon once we learn where God specifically is calling us. I never thought I would put myself in a place where I had to ask other people for money. It isn’t easy and, frankly, from where we’ve been it seems awfully embarrassing. But, when I think about how God is already changing us to make this possible by making me realize that every penny I have has been entrusted to me to further His kingdom and to spread the good news of Jesus Christ we get excited. That truth alone (one we should have already been living but weren't and couldn’t until now) has made all of this worth it.

Most of all we need your prayer and your encouragement desperately. We can feel totally safe and fulfilled in God’s hands one moment and then feel like we are starting to sink into the ocean of despair the next. Your love, encouragement, and prayerful support mean more than it ever has before. And, that, again, is yet another thing that makes all of this worth it.

If you’ve seen “The End of the Spear” you may be familiar with the name Jim Elliot, who was one of the men who lost their lives on a mission to the Waodani in Ecuador. One of his quotes has given us great comfort: “He is no fool who gives away what he cannot keep to gain what he cannot lose.” We also are reminded of that great scripture that so many hold close to their hearts, Proverbs 3:5-6, and cling to the truth that God will make our paths straight and level when we trust in Him with all our hearts and lean not on our own understanding.

May God be glorified through our lives,

The Riley family
Bryan, Tara, Tanner, Keaton and Regan

2006-06-29T08:37:00.000-05:00

It has been a while since I've posted. Of course, I kind of like just leaving my beautiful children front and center. :) A few months ago God shook me awake to Him again and I've been on a very difficult but amazing journey. I will be writing more about it soon. In the meantime, I just want to share some scripture that has meant a lot to me (from Psalm 119):

May my cry come before you, O LORD; give me understanding according to your word. May my supplication come before you; deliver me according to your promise. May my lips overflow with praise, for you teach me your decrees. May my tongue sing of your word, for all your commands are righteous. May your hand be ready to help me, for I have chosen your precepts. I long for your salvation, O LORD, and your law is my delight. Let me live that I may praise you, and may your laws sustain me. I have strayed like a lost sheep. Seek your servant, for I have not forgotten your commands.

Psalm 119 is such an amazing poem of the power of God's Word. And as we know that Jesus is the Word, it's just amazing to meditate on. If we are not clothing ourselves with Christ, the Word, daily, and throughout our days, then we leave ourselves very open to attack. I pray God will give me the grace to immerse myself consistently in Him and His Word!

2006-06-04T22:19:00.000-05:00

God has blessed me amazingly. Tanner Gracen, 7, Keaton Tait, 4, and Regan Cambryn, 2.

2006-06-02T00:03:00.000-05:00

Captured

A feeling I can’t explain
Living life for me;
I did what I “wanted” to do.
Seeking my every desire,
Fulfilling the urges of my heart.
First, happy—
Believing I was living the world’s dream;
Then, tired…
Unable to keep up with the latest speed;
Slipping into boredom
Because no matter what I tried,
I ultimately found discontent.
Becoming bitter—
Because the fantasy life I forged
Left me broken and spent.
Finally, afraid…
Because what I had chased
Now was chasing me,
And the things I desired and owned, owned me.
Captured and chained by what had been whims,
Now were bars—separating me from Him.

2006-06-01T22:25:00.000-05:00

Writing from Philadelphia, PA, as I am preparing for a lengthy trial. I'm reading Desiring God by John Piper on the recommendation of my good friends over at www.arkansasrazorbaptist.blogspot.com. Fantastic!!! On p. 99 he quotes from a C.S. Lewis sermon as follows:

If there lurks in most modern minds the notion that to desire our own good and earnestly hope for the enjoyment of it is a bad thing, I submit that this notion has crept in from Kant and the Stoics and is no part of the Christian faith. Indeed, if we consider the unblushing promises of reward and the staggering nature of the rewards promised in the Gospels, it would seem that our Lord finds our desires, not too strong, but too weak. We are half-hearted creatures, fooling about with drink and sex and ambition when infinite joy is offered us, like an ignorant child who wants to go on making mud pies in a slum because he cannot imagine what is meant by the offer of a holiday at sea. We are far too easily pleased.

And then, Piper continues: "That's it! The enemy of worship is not that our desire for pleasure is too strong, but too weak! We have settled for a home, a family, a few friends, a job, a television, a microwave oven, an occasional night out, a yearly vacation, [a cell phone, a blog, a cool car, a great sound system, coffee, a fishing boat, a girls' night out, etc. and etc.] and a ... computer. We have accustomed ourselves to such meager short-lived pleasures that our capacity for joy has shriveled. And so our worship has shriveled."

(emphasis mine)

People let themselves be ashamed to live for joy, to show true unfettered emotion, to shout, to cry, to moan, to simply live. Jesus called us to come to Him as the little children did, unashamed and full of joy. I watch my three children, 7, 4, and 2, and they beam with excitement when I walk through the door or when I simply sit and read to them. That is the joy we can have when we focus on our Heavenly Father. Why do we settle for anything less?! But we do every day, exchanging the truth of our Lord for a lie. Jesus set his eyes on the hope set before Him and that is how He endured the cross (Hebrews 12:2), and that is what we are called to... to fix our eyes on Christ and live just as He lived, doing any and everything God wills for us because of the hope, the joy, the unfettered and incredible delight we have before us when we live for HIM!!!! AMAZING GRACE HOW SWEET THE SOUND!!! Let it be proclaimed in every breath we take, every step we make, every moment we have here on this earth. God commanded us to DELIGHT IN HIM!!! Psalm 37:4. What is keeping you from doing so? What distracts you? What idols have crept into your life that you are settling for something less than the true worship of the one true God?? Zealously examine yourself to see if you are settling for anything less than Him. Is the joy of your salvation real every moment? Psalm 51:10. Have you sold all you had because of the treasure of your salvation? Matthew 13:44. What keeps you from tasting and seeing how incredibly good God is? Psalm 34:8

I know i detoured from my focus on Him. And I praise Him for the discipline that has brought me back. May I keep rejoicing and thanking Him every moment for this joy He has so freely given. We are so deceived by this world.

A world of want
Ever unfulfilled;
More, the mantra...
The melody of discontent builds.
For what could be better
Than a new shirt,
A gas hungry SUV,
A work of art,
Or a garden canopy.
Surely our crowded closets
Can hold one more thing - or fifteen.
Come out and see
The latest fad;
Max out your credit card;
It can't be that bad.
With our houses filled
But our hearts empty,
Our souls killed,
And on our lips
Only...
"Give me."

Why??? Because we were created with a desire for joy. Let that God given blessing be what drives you to fill your joy with Him. He alone can fulfill it. He alone can satisfy. He alone can perfect and complete us. Let that cry of "Give me" be to Him.

2006-05-30T11:31:00.000-05:00

This humbling message comes from Today's Proverb, Proverbs 30: 2-6:

2 "I am the most ignorant of men; I do not have a man's understanding.
3 I have not learned wisdom, nor have I knowledge of the Holy One.
4 Who has gone up to heaven and come down? Who has gathered up the wind in the hollow of his hands? Who has wrapped up the waters in his cloak? Who has established all the ends of the earth? What is his name, and the name of his son? Tell me if you know!
5 "Every word of God is flawless; he is a shield to those who take refuge in him.
6 Do not add to his words, or he will rebuke you and prove you a liar.

Like the message Job and his friends received in those final chapters of that great book, I realize how different God is from me. Nevertheless, I find myself practically every moment trying to make myself god. What folly. And I do it repeatedly even after repeatedly finding myself in one jam after another as a result of that same folly. And oh how often in that quest for personal godhood do i refuse to obey verse 6. I make for myself (and, unfortuntately, try to make for others) rules that I know I can follow (but that are additive to His words) and then some how consider myself good for doing so. How utterly self-righteous is that?! And, perhaps now I am projecting to others my own folly, but it strikes me that much of the "battle" going on in the SBC and within the universal church occurs because of that same sin. Why do we feel compelled to add to the gospel? Remember that John 1:1 proclaims that Jesus is the Word. Why do we want to add to that?? Jesus alone is the propitiation, not anything that we, frail humanity, can add to it. Anything we add suggests that God alone is not sufficient and that we can be as god(s), saving ourselves and others.

2006-05-28T22:50:00.000-05:00

Jesus repeatedly decried the religious leadership of his day, noting their focus on legalism and lack of love. Paul wrote further about how we are not to judge, lest we be judged. Growing up in a small town Southern Baptist Church I was generally taught that living a certain way and believing a certain way was what defined being a good Christian. There was one truth, the conservative fundamentalist approach of the SBC understood that, and it included following quite a few rules, whether they were scriptural or not. Now, in fairness, many of those rules were based on scriptural principles or were, at a minimum, prudent things to do or to avoid. But, generally speaking, as I've grown in my relationship with Christ, I see that much of that focus was more like the religious leaders of Jesus' day: a focus on legalism at the cost of love and such a focus risks being focused on the splinters in another's eye (judgmentally), all the while a plank is in the eye of the one adjudicating.

Oh, the freedom of seeing this and releasing that life of being saved from the world by my own good living and believing a certain way. Of course, living in the reality of God's saving grace and that salvation is not based on my conduct at all is wonderful, and liberating, but it must be tempered always by truth and love. Furthermore, what I found as I moved away from the infantile life of a conduct-based theology, I began to struggle with the same sin I was trying to move away from. Instead of judging people because they might say a bad word, drink a beer, listen to certain music, or watch an R-rated movie, I found myself judging people who lived that conduct-, rules-, and religion/me-based life. I even wanted to poke them in the eye for doing so. I might have realized that I didn't want to be a Pharisee, but now I am tempted to sit around on a high horse looking down on those who haven't gotten "there" yet (I'm saying this is how I think when i get all proud of myself). When will I be free of this self-centered focus I drift towards every time I shift my focus from God??

I am afraid I've made this too short and some of the connectors are missing. I hope readers will make sense of it...

2006-05-27T21:27:00.000-05:00

I am taking a moment to post something apolitical and simply a commentary on today's society.

Plastic-
Tucked away,
Unnatural efforts
At foreplay.
What lies inside
Driving these gains,
A desire to improve
Or distractions from hidden pain?
Why do we so often
Look in the mirror
And see something dreadful,
A caricature of what is actually there?
It seems especially odd
When to others we show
A brave facade,
And pridefully we glow,
Gracing the world with
The confident smile
Of someone who has
The epitome of style.
What is it about our society
That ever herds us to seek more,
Never content and always hungry
For the next "latest thing," we whore
After idols;
Not necessarily gold or silver,
But we worship them nonetheless;
Abandoning the Real
For something less-
For ... Plastic.

2006-05-26T07:31:00.000-05:00

Wow. Being new to blogging, I am somewhat surprised at how cynically people can view another's words, even when the words are straight from scripture. Perhaps as an attorney and someone who is starting to have some years behind him, I shouldn't be so surprised, but I am. I recently posted the prayer that is below on several sites. These were all sites where many of the participants were people who appeared to be decrying the modern day phariseeacalism that is afflicting the church, a sentiment I share and from which my prayer and words came. Nevertheless, the words were questioned as pious and created offense to some.

I think this illustrates a failing of blogging. I understand that blogs create situations where we can't see body language or hear tone and all we have are words; moreover, we often don't know the individuals who are writing. Consequently, there is a lot of room for misinterpretation. It seems to me the wisest way to handle those types of questions would be to use direct, private email to the individuals if we have questions about their intentions or meaning.

Words...
Watch how you wield them;
Tools of great power
To heal and to harm.
May my heart be
To use my words for good;
Evermore prudently,
Communicating as You would.

For the record, here is, in a very short fashion, part of the reason why I began blogging. When I began reading a number of blogs this past weekend it broke my heart, not because I'm some super spiritual person or because I'm young and naive, but because what I saw was, from my perspective, having the same effect on the lost as what is noted so well at Kevin Bussey's http://studentguru.blogspot.com, when he posted the picture of an angry looking woman picketing the Da Vinci Code. It struck me that many were arguing over very insignificant things in a way that didn't reflect the law of love and liberty that we should be proclaiming. We seem to be focused more on rules and conduct than we are relationships and character. And, I know I do this as well. When I do, I have to wonder if I am falling short of bearing Christ's true gospel.

2006-05-25T08:12:00.000-05:00

Father, may we all be one, as Christ and You are one, and may we all be one in You, that the world may believe that Christ was sent of You...Christ in us and the Father in Christ, that we may be made perfect in one, and that the world may know that the Father sent Christ, and loved us all as the Father loved Christ.

Oh Father, thank you that we have been called to liberty, but I pray you protect us all from using liberty as an opportunity for the flesh; instead, show us the grace that we might be empowered through love to serve one another. Because, Lord, you taught us that all the law is fulfilled in one word: Love. That we shall love our neighbor as ourselves. And you warn us that if we bite and devour one another we should beware because such conduct will result in us consuming one another. Lord, please help us.

And Father, forgive us for making this a denominational thing. It isn't. It is about You, not any one denomination or set of beliefs. May all who believe and confess that Jesus is Lord and that God raised Jesus from the dead unite and be as one just as Jesus prayed for us. And may we refuse to proclaim ourselves and simply proclaim You, humbly, in prayer and thanksgiving. May we repent of our sins of pride and lust and selfishness and turn to You. Heal us and heal our land, Lord.

2006-05-23T21:24:00.000-05:00

Focus...
Where is yours?
Are you focused on something you can share,
or something you can't dare
Let others scrutinize?
Is there fear in your eyes
When someone might guess
What you cannot confess?
Does it keep you up at night,
Or is your heart light?
Are you afraid someone might see,
Or are you living free,
Free of worry and free of care--
a life of love and peace?
Oh sweet release.
Are you chained to something hidden,
unable to let go?
Evermore guilt ridden,
But slowly becoming a pro
At concealing your heart;
able to see "clearly" in the dark,
yet wondering if you can
Keep it all under control,
Or if it will all spin
Out of ...
Focus

Focus
A weapon
That can be wielded
Or yielded to.
Where is yours?
Does it bring you success
Or like the flame-enticed moth
Does it hold death?

2006-05-22T17:07:00.000-05:00

I am trying to determine how debating fine points of doctrine really demonstrates Christian love to the lost. Are we more focused on religion and self-righteousness, like the Pharisee of Luke 18 than we are on loving others? Are we like the nation of Israel prophesied against in Isaiah 58:1-14, where God says stop focusing on religion and start focusing on things like feeding the hungry? I'd really like to see others' thoughts on this.

By focusing on things that are cultural or religious practices, are we neglecting the fact that God is God and we are human? I do not deny that we have Christ in us or that He has given us everything we need for life and godliness, or that the Spirit can reveal to us the meaning of scripture, but our relationship with God is primarily that--each individual's personal relationship with God. And, as C.S. Lewis emphasized through Lucy and Aslan, each human's story and relationship with Him is unique to that individual, and what one individual may eat or drink or not eat or not drink, or what one individual may believe about a nonessential aspect of our faith (whatever that means) versus another is really more about God working in that individual's life to make him or her more like Christ.

Moreover, it strikes me that if we are focused on someone else's beliefs or practices we are neglecting the race we are supposed to be running. No runner wins by looking over their shoulder at the other racers. God desires that we fix our eyes on Him and Him alone and then to allow Him, as we offer ourselves to Him, to transform our lives. And, even by focusing on a practice or doctrine are we in some way not taking our eyes off of Him or elevating something to idol status? And do we become like the Pharisee who says, "Thank God I am not like that sinner, who believes that it is okay to drink alcohol" or "who believes it is okay to accept someone baptized in that way" or "who believes that it may not have been six literal days of Creation" or "[fill in the blank doctrine]"? God's love alone saves others, not the law or anyone's rendition of doctrine. And, if we think our doctrine can save us then we have moved God off the throne and placed ourselves there, the sin that humanity has been battling since Adam and Eve decided they knew better than God. Our goal and hope and prayer should be that the love He instills in us will radiate to others and thereby bring Him glory and demonstrate to others the One True Source of Love, Life, and Acceptance.

It is disconcerting to men and women who simply want to love God and grow to be more like Christ to see leaders of churches go to task over matters that may ultimately be insignificant. Furthermore, it turns away lost men and women who may otherwise be seeking God's love. Sure, some may fear the slippery slope. Or, some might say if you don't have the faith to believe "X" then it shows you don't have the faith to believe "Y." And, yes, many fear that we are going to succumb to picking and choosing what we accept from the Scripture and what we don't. But, I would challenge that we all already do that at some level. And, it scares me when someone appears to to proclaim something as true in the name of the Lord and then rejects any other interpretation or apology... Bottom line, it is not demonstrating Christ. They don't know we are Christians by our doctrine. They don't know we are Christians by our lines. They don't know we are Christians by our lipservice to any particular creed. They will know we are Christians by our love. How can we better show our love??? How can we follow the commands to love God with all our hearts, souls, and minds and love our neighbors as ourselves???

2006-05-21T15:49:00.001-05:00

Here's something I wrote while on an airplane, facing the fact that I so often focus on me rather than on Him. How often I try to be the "god" of my world rather than living in the reality of Who God is, for me and for all in this world.

My breathing is rough,
And my heart, a wreck;
My mind is reeling--
Everything unchecked.

How did I get here
This tailspinning travail,
Where all i see
Is my own misery?

It seems I've built myself
A house of mirrors--
Where the only view
Is the one I idolize.
Yes, I've buried myself
In a coffin of my own design
Where all i can see . . .
Is me.

One step away from death,
This mirrored house of horrors.
I must stop this nightmarish trip,
And find One who is worthy of my worship.

When I try to break the glass
I can't find any tool;
Because I keep looking in the mirrors
Enraptured by my own tears.

No, I've built a life I can't tear down,
So I'm asking you to do it for me--
For though you gave me the solid foundation,
I erected a self-serving station.

Break me down;
Destroy this narcissistic clown;
I want to see the world as it is--
A world that isn't all about me.

I know you have created a beautiful place,
But I stopped looking at it years ago.
I just want to be able to see reality--
Once again . . . finding liberty.

2006-05-20T22:24:00.000-05:00

As a hummingbird flutters its wings
So my focus shifts--
One moment joy,
The next despair;
A thought of love
Deteriorating into lust.
What should I do,
When my own heart I can't trust?
At once giving freely
And holding tightly;
Letting go
While gripping fast;
Disciplined
Then uncontrolled;
Relaxed
Then urgent.
The paradoxes of my soul
Overwhelm me.
In spite of all this
You promise me love and life,
So as I sink lower
Into this melancholy strife
I can only say 'thank you
For loving me,'
And then, suddenly,
Your indescribable peace
Comforts me.